Why is couple counselling not recommended when there is DV ?

[Doinmummy]

I've seen this advice quite a lot. I was involved in an abusive relationship and we went to Relate together - it didn't work.

What are the reasons for it not being recommended?

(I was horrified when we bumped into our counsellor at a party one night
and after watching him and my ex get pissed together I didn't go back )

shellybear.wordpress.com/2008/01/14/what-couplesfamily-therapy-does-for-an-abuser-by-lundy-bancroft/

whoops......it's already been posted....Hi Arth!

A very clever and manipulative person could think themselves above all that, of course, and use their priveliged position to truly fuck people up.

^^
This I fear is exactly what he is doing.

AFingers, that "beyond repair" comment was dismissive, I am sorry x

My language was trying to explain how serious I consider the damage that these men can do to you. Of course you can recover, yes if the bastard doesn't kill you (# 2 women a week)

I'm glad I got out when I did- not before he did a proper 'head fuck' on me though .

I am still 'mending' 16 years on.

I can't believe the counsellor got pissed with your husband!! That is completely unprofessional and ridiculous!!

It's sometimes unavoidable bumping into clients out and about but you don't get pissed with them FFS!

Standard practice is not to acknowledge a client unless they do you, and then to have as little to do with them as possible. If I was at a party and a client turned up I would leave. Too many boundary issues.

Its absolutely true. Unfortunately,my head wasn't in the right place for me to put a complaint in.