Feeling low today :(

[MoonshineWashingLine]

Feel like I am going to be stuck in this shitty house with its shitty memories for ages. I feel trapped. I only earn a pt admin wage and am still waiting for the single mum benefits to kick in so I am skint :(
I really want to move (rented house) but I don't have the money for a deposit. Feel like I need a new start, physically and mentally, to leave behind the memories of the abusive relationship I ended just over two weeks ago. But I can't. I am skint and so are my close family. I just feel stuck :(

No sensible advice (except Moneysavingexpert forums for money stuff) but sending lots of hugs.

As a short term gap could you move furniture around? I don't know how much you're allowed to decorate in rented, but perhaps if you change what you can in the short term it may help.

Good luck.

Second the idea to move the furniture around and - as soon as you have a spare fiver - get to a jumble sale & pick up some different-coloured curtains, cushions or throws. Seems trivial but it does actually help

Thanks. I think I am going to have to have a clear out of sorts. I think it also didn't help that my credit card application was rejected the other day. Had a rubbish one for ages that's supposed to improve your credit but it clearly hasn't yet even though I pay it off every month. Think I might be over to MSE soon!

I really dislike this house as well. Its not very nice. I just want out but looks like I will have to save up for a while.

I agree - put your personal stamp on it somehow. Paint if you can...certainly move some things around.
Reclaim it as your space alone.

Clear-outs are very therapeutic. I'm no fan of housework personally but have recently been forced to go through stuff and sort it into 'keep', 'bin' and 'charity bag'. Once you get into it (with frequent and breaks) it's quite cheery

You need to come at this from a different angle. Yes you are in a house you hate, but you are free from your abusive relationship.
Sit down with your DCs and have a group hug. You love them, they live you and that really is all that matters.
Sorry not trying to minimise how you are feeling but try to think of this as a temp rough patch.

Thank you :) I'm feeling a bit better now. Trying to asses what I actually need in life rather than what I want. I work in a really nice area so I always see these lovely houses and wish me and dd could live in one, but really I am thankful that we have a house at all. And if I am honest with myself that isn't really what I want from life anyway.