Our marriage is at crisis point but I don't want to end it. After some reading, I had a bit of a lightbulb moment that maybe he's suffering from depression but in denial.
Our relationship has been growing apart since early last year. I was pg with my second and DH was working like mad so we hardly saw each other in the lead up to the birth. By which time he was stressed and knackered but trying to be strong for me I think. Immediately after the birth he was sort of distant but I was too busy with a newborn for it to totally register.
And so the 6 months following were of course a whirlwind of newborn and I also have a 2.5 year old so we were concentrating on the kids and lack of sleep, money worries and we are doing up our house but i life is good and could be amazing.
In the past few months Dh on the other hand has been slowly checking himself out of family life. He doesn't take himself of to the pub or other hobbies or go out all the time. He's there, in the same room but detached - it's hard to explain. He has no idea about me and kids do and even if i try and involve him or tell him stuff its like he cant retain it, not even the important stuff. He's lacking in enthusiasm and cold, joyless even. He's also simmering with anger and if he blows its like a big tantrum with wall punching. I've tried to encourage him to go out or do some sport or anything to improve his mood but he won't.
I'm afraid to say I've started handling the situation really badly so now we have lots of rowing, blame and tears. i feel frustrated and helpless, rejected and incredibly lonely around him and I want my husband back. I wonder if its my fault that I should make more effort but the resentment prevents me.
Sorry for the long post. If you are still reading - does this sound like depression? If so what can I do?