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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Scared to tell the truth

77 replies

brian467 · 25/03/2014 03:38

My wife knows of an affair I had with a coworker and we're working on our marriage, but she isn't aware of another affair I had. I want to come clean about it, but I'm terrified it'll end us.

For the last seven months, I’ve been having a sexual affair with our children’s after school nanny. She’s a student at a local college who was recommended to us by my wife’s coworker. If I’m honest with myself (and it’s no excuse whatsoever), I got caught up in a younger, attractive woman aggressively coming onto me and I didn’t stop it. It was fun and exciting and I compartmentalized the guilt by telling myself that I loved my wife and it was only sex with the nanny. I finally ended it last week and the nanny said she understood that I didn’t want to jeopardize losing my family. It’s over, but I feel my wife should know; it’s not fair to her if we're going to build a new marriage on trust and respect.

OP posts:
KateSMumsnet · 25/03/2014 16:35

Hi folks, thanks for all your reports,

We'll be removing this thread shortly.

LineRunner · 25/03/2014 16:36

You mean it's not real???

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