Would you dare....?

[ratclare]

Have your coil removed without telling your husband ? Especially when he has said he doesnt want another child but you desperately do ?

no - never. I'm desperate for a 3rd - but DH doesn't and despite how much I'd lovw another one I could never live with myself if I decieved him.

Lets turn this around, how would you feel if a man lied about contraception and got you pregnant against your wishes???

Absolutely not.

Never, ever, ever. It' dishonest and deceitful.

Sorry - I would.

Have you told him how much you want a baby?

No. Never. Truly despicable thing to do.

Never never never.

You'd have to deal with your husband's reaction to the extra child, forever, and know it was your fault.

No no no no! Apart from anything else, if you did fall he would be disappointed which would spoil it for you. He may change his mind if you give him time and then you can both be excited together!

no way

no not ever. And tbh I think that it says a lot about the amount of respect you have for your h/p if you're prepared to deceive him in such a manner. What would you then do if he turned it around and left you over it? some people genuinely don't want another child for whatever reason, and they should never, not under any circumstances, be made to have a child they don't want.

ok how about have your coil removed ,tell him and leave contraception up to him !!!

ratclare - have you children together already? If yes then I wouldn't but if you haven't any then maybe.....

agree with Fio - that would been fine - as long as he knows as soon as you've had it removed.

God, No!

Tricking someone into being a father is awful. Couldnt live with myself!

pssst - Tamba - we're discussing her 5.55 post now

I normally only read the OP

NO NO NO to removing the coild without telling. If I was truly desperate for another child I would tell dh that I was getting the coild removed and nOT intending to use any form of contraception. In fact I would tell him twice. If he couldnt be bothered to use condoms then - thats his look out!!!

i wouldnt do it, i smell trouble ahead. i would echo what others have said tell him you are talking it out and its time for johnnies or a baby.

oh my god now. i'd love 3, dp doesn't. If I fell pregnant because the condom failed us or something then it's happening but would never do it on purpose, no never.

What if you ha a 3rd child and he was so unhappy with the situation he left you? Do you want a 3rd child more than you want your DH and your 2 kids father around?

Lemostartree - exacly! A man's fertility is his responsibility. If he doesn't want any more children then it's up to him to do something about it - his fertility is his choice. Condoms are a start and vasectomy is an option if he definately doesn't want any more children.

Ratclare - in your situation I don't think I could have a coil removed without telling a partner first. It's easy to have an 'accident' with the pill but you're actively taking steps to conceive. You need to talk to your husband about this and how desperate it's making you feel.