Epic fail?

[newsandreviews]

You may have seen other posts about trying to move on from emotionally abusive control freak. I have done a week. I was in absolute pieces yesterday and felt my depresssion getting a really hard strong grip and suffocating me. I rang him. He didn't answer. 2 hours later a text saying sorry missed call was cutting grass. I did not respond as i was doing my online Freedom program. half hour later he rings. tells me we are never getting back together. i need to move on. we want different things. i persuade him to come over last night with every intention of going to bed with him. and we do. nothing sorted. not back together. i still don't want to be with him. well i don't think. head no, heart yes.

just dont know what to do now. he is a liar

however, depression feels lifted and strangely i feel a little empowered cause i got him to come back.

no doubt it will return today though... depression not him!!!!

[Logg1e]

The problem with the Tinder thing is that it makes you look defined by your sexuality and availability.

[BluBurd]

I know it's hard not to when in a state, I have had some real hard times where I have fought so hard to not get in contact but desperately wanted to.

There is life after these men OP. There were men before them and there will be men after them. Keep your friends and family close.

I am doing okay, my crisis team are very happy with my progress. I am focusing on learning to be on my own and be comfortable with it. Will be a very long time before I consider getting involved again.

Be strong OP, work on your self esteem and keep your self respect. I lost mine constantly begging him to take me back when I hadn't even done anything wrong.

[newsandreviews]

oh now this is an epic fail
came out of work on lunch break and saw him. he;s coming over tonight
ffs

[BluBurd]

Was he waiting for you?

[newsandreviews]

No. and I was not where I usually work as we had a meeting in a local hotel.

[BluBurd]

It's not going to work out, you know that don't you OP? Just today my crisis worker asked me what's stopping me getting back with my ex. Because it will never be a relationship that's good for me and neither will yours be. It might be okay for a few weeks but then it will go back to the way it always is. And you will be back to square one.

Trust me, I wish so badly my ex was the one for me. But he's not. Tell him not to come over. Look after your son and get yourself well. Once you are well if you still want him then, fair enough. But I doubt you will.

[newsandreviews]

Blu, i am sure you are right but as I said to him today I just think what we do have (the good bits) are toooo good to throw away. :(

Really need to get myself a good counsellor!

I admire your strength Blu. Well done :)