Gah family. So petty. Am I being over sensitive?

[Gretagumbo]

I am a single working mum. I am 36 and self sufficient. My family 99% of the time are brilliant, and are v. supportive but sometimes they have a tendency to stick the boot in and run me down whilst offering this support. This week has finished me off.

My house is not a show home but not a shit hole either. My mum came in at the beginning of the week saying how awful it was and at least I should of cleaned the kitchen as I know she likes a clean kitchen. She just kept on with my sister as an audience about how I'll get rats and am unhygienic. She proceeds with angrily scrubbing my kitchen.

Dad offers to look at my dodgy toilet and then yells at me for pooing excessively & putting tampax down the loo. This in front of his friend (one of my work colleagues) and my neighbours.

My sister then has a strop on as my son over sleeps through his nap and she wanted to take him out somewhere. I was unaware of her plans. This was my fault apparently. My dad stated that she had a right to be pissed off as she had been trying to help me.

My brother helped me with something yesterday. I thanked him for it and offered him some chocolate. My dad berated me today for not thanking him sufficiently apparently he was affronted by my lack of gratitude.

I walk into the house today and you know when you can tell they've all been having a good old bitch. I approached my mum to try and sort it out but she was still in the pissed off zone.

I am not ungrateful at all but it just seems that every offer of help comes with a put down, it's making me feel like shit. I'm not sure how to go forward as I need some help but really need to stand up to this sort of stuff.

Am drinking baileys in bed...

I am totally accepting of the tampax thing but I always thought they were ok to flush when I actually think about it dumb I know. I have now been mortified into changing my toilet habits.

I will buy a bin and never flush a tampax again
I will buy a DIY manual & plunger to personally deal with my large poos.
I will politely decline offered unwanted help
I will rehearse assertive phrases, specifically fuck off to far side of fuck & fuck off some more.

There was a backup blockage in the main sewer in our cul-de-sac a while ago. The guys who came to clear it said it was caused by baby-wipes. No mention of tampons. Thing is, no one on our close has had a baby/toddler in many many years. I reckon they found toilet wipes.
You'd think they'd have mentioned tampons, if they'd found them.

Sanitary towels? No way!!

Sod the plunger.. just do rubber gloves and a firm grip

But the help with negative strings attached I really would man.. they're treating you like a little kid and only you can change that. I know personally it's hard not to feel like that little kid around your parents but it really can be done.

Definitely assertive phrases... once you start doing it, it does get easier. A bit like saying no to lending money when you're used to saying yes.

Greta it's not that dumb, when you google it and discover that around half of people do so. To clarify, I mean that, even if it's proven to be a bad idea, you're in the company of 50% of the female population who still do it.

50% of the population where? In places like Greece their pipes are small so even loo paper goes in the bin.

Yes, and in Greek toilets, there's a sign that tells you that. So of course I wouldn't dream of flushing anything other than bodily fluids.
I'm talking countries (or areas of countries) where the main sewers are wider.

Well to be on the safe side, I just bin everything that isn't loo paper. I couldn't stand the embarrassment (again).