This Year marks 10 years of Marriage. Happy? That's a topic for discussion on another day. Anyway, more than nine years later, we've had two little boys (older one with special needs and praying little one will be ok - still too young to tell). I love my boys, they keep me going and give me a reason to get up and do what I need to do.
My husband? Now him I believe I have come to hate! Years of bitterness gave way to despise and finally I feel I actually hate the man! We started having problems early in our relationship and despite suggestions to see a counsellor, he has repeatedly refused and evaded this or kept saying we can work things out ourselves which never happens. He is quite outspoken and can argue his corner while I am not very good at expressing myself clearly. My biggest problem is keeping things bottled up (to avoid trouble) and then saying things in anger when I can't take it any more.
For years my husband called me lazy and selfish and this always hurt a lot considering that I went back to work full time after my maternity leave following our first child. I would get home from work and have to deal with a baby, and all the cooking cleaning, etc. (He doesn't do housework.)
I am currently on an extended leave taking care of our two boys and my husband works full time. He is very fortunate in that his work is very flexible and he can work from home, go in earlier or late and work for longer etc. The problem is this - my husband is always on the computer! Ever since we started living together as husband and wife he has always been on the computer every waking minute! At first it was study then creating websites, reading the news etc. I would go to bed and leave him sat at the computer and wake up the following morning find him there (if he ever came to bed, it would be the first thing he did in the morning), leave for work and come back to find him still at the computer.
Years later I have had all manner of resolutions and promises to cut back but these never last. It has always been like I (and now the boys, come second). He will leave the computer for a few mins to play with the boys or do something else but there is always an excuse to go back and check something and then he will be off typing and this can go on for an hour before he realises.
Anyway, he says technology is his hobby and well, most people have hobbies we just don't get so involved and leave out everything else (including personal hygiene). There is always something pending that needs to have been done and I have come to a point where I try not to ask, I just do it if I can.
Now, I appreciate he has a demanding job but then who doesn't and I believe a little time management, proper prioritisation and organisation is all that's needed, But no, he chooses to chat with his friends on the web forums, almost all night long, use every excuse to remain at home in the morning so he can do his own stuff then go to work in the afternoon (when I have both boys) and not come home till after 10 at night and the cycle continues. He is forever going on about how busy he is and will go to the office on a Sunday, apparently to catch up.
Every year comes with a new time wasting project and to be honest I am fed up!