Backs of chairs, doors, bannisters, radiators. Anyone else live with a 'draper' and can anything be done?

[nevergoogle]

I swear it's like living in a Salvador Dali painting around here. Every conceivable place where one could drape a jumper, a towel, a coat has one of DH's items draped over it.

A bit of background. We recently swapped back from a SAHD/WOHM setup to DH being back at work and me at home for maternity leave. In the meantime, he's developed a habit of 'draping shit' everywhere. And where previously I was either too tired from work to bother, and gladly happy to delegate the keeping of the house to him for that time, I'm now at home and surrounded by it. I can round the stuff up and put it back where it's supposed to be but after a weekend, i'm back to square one.

Would pigeon spikes work? or simply create more draping possibilities?

H had a childhood home with a large staircase in it. They all drape their towels over the bannister upstairs

I HATE IT

it's so annoying. we have hooks for coats and jumpers. i don't get it.

dp drapes things on door handles - and then the doors don't close properly - particularly the understairs coat cupboard. Why doesn't he just put it IN the cupboard??

Oh god DP does this, especially the towel-bannister thing. Argh.

I did cut him a deal once that if he would hang stuff up I would try to stop leaving apple cores everywhere but it didn't last.

quite, none of the cupboards or doors close.

I can beat this.

My DH can't bare to be clothed when he gets in, unless we have guests. So he literally takes all his clothes, except for pants, off in one go by the front door creating at effect like he has melted (think the wicked witch of the west in the wizard of oz)

He does at least now take the pile of "melted clothes" and put them somewhere less irritating (although not normally the washing basket until he's asked by me very grumpily) but when we first lived together they would just stay by the door.

Really fucking odd

I am a draper. So is dh. And kids. I can't even get annoyed with anyone about it.

I do try but I do it absentmindedly. I just de drape as I go along.

Does he walk around nekkid

I am a draper too. DS has carried it one step further though - he's a dropper

OH drapes wet towels over the top of the toilet door , busting for a wee and you have to work out why the blinking door won't shut. All surfaces are draped but that's the one that annoys me

DH doesn't walk around nekkid.

It would appear that he gets dressed in the mornings in the kitchen which may be a nice thing in that he is trying not to disturb me in the mornings. That works and I'm grateful. But his towel is on the kitchen door, his pj bottoms over the dining room chair and there's a pile of dirty laundry 'next to' but not in the washing machine. Are his undies entitled to bypass the laundry basket?

From here I can also see a jumper on the radiator, a body warmer puffer jacket and waterproof trousers on the top of the under stairs cupboard door and a carrier bag on the handle.

At this point I might also mention that he dries his hands on the towel in the bathroom while walking out of the bathroom only to drape it somewhere else. There is never a towel there for me. I'm considering padlocking it to the back of the bathroom door.

I'm a draper . My coat , bag , jumper being draped on chairs doesn't bother me , but I HATE it if other family members do it, although I never say anything.

Alas, this kind of low level shit is all part of SAHM life. As you say, he tidied up the crap before and you didn't notice it.

Focus on the compensations for being at home and treat it like commuting- shit but unavoidable. To be rewarded by massive slab of chocolate.

Or of course you could get a brazier and have a ceremonial burning once a week. Or dump all his stuff on his side of the bed, especially if it is still damp.

I think this is it Beast. 'The low level shit...'

At work I would bring it up at his supervision meeting or appraisal. I could suggest ways he could improve his performance. Yes, I'm impossible to work for and he's clearly not an employee.

And of course I could list loads of things he did this weekend that were brilliantly helpful and uber-fatherly for the kids.

But FFS, enough with the draping!

Ah yes, work. I enjoy work. If I give instructions, they are (largely) carried out.

People don't, on the whole, say "Why should I, I feel sick, you love him better than me, I want a wee, I hate you".

Nor do they say, "yes, dear in a minute"

Sadly, delegation and management do not work at home.

Wanton destuction of personal property, on the other hand...

Could you put it all in a box and leave him to go through the box when he needs whatever it is? That would contain it a bit but you wouldn't have to go putting everything back where it goes.

Oh God I hate this.

I keep telling DH that clothes are either dirty (washing bin) or clean (put them away). When he bathes the children he leaves all of their clothes draped over the bannister including dirty pants and socks and if I don't remove them he puts the next days clothes over the bannister next to them, including dirty pants and socks.

When he had his own house (pre children) he draped all his clothes over the banisters, including towels.

His dirty running kit has been draped over the heated towel rail in the guest bathroom for weeks. I remove it to clean the bathroom, then put it back.

I've stopped complaining as I don't think he's ever going to change. I just go round my house folding, tutting, plumping, hoovering and dusting in an ever increasing state of frustration and then deciding I don't have the energy to keep tidying up after everyone.

Hmm, I see what you're saying.

I am going to hide the huge chunky wooden chopping board though. He uses it for the tiniest of jobs and it doesn't fit in the washing machine.

I can performance manage in a stealthy way.

sorry, the I see what you're saying was directed at Beast.

Selendra, this man lives from boxes.

Before me, he lived in a tipi.

In which case, declutter him back to tipi levels. Throw all his shit away.

Perhaps furniture is taking a while to get used to?

and yes, i'm all over that one already.

there is less shit around for him to drape already.

Oh god!!!

Reading this I've realised that I'm a draper!!!

Oh no!!!!!!