How do you forget an Ex? I can't get past it.

[SleepyDopeyGrumpy]

He treated me like.shit.
lied to me, cheated on me, let me down time and time again.

we broke up so many times and I always went back.
the last time we broke up I moved Hours away to try and heal but nothing's working.
I know he has moved.on, he's publicly flaunting his flings online so why can't I forget him?

I am on council list but only band c no no luck and I can't afford to move out as I would have to quit work due to the fact that parents would not travel to mine to stay until late or pick boys up from school everyday and then drop them off unless I live within 10 minutes of their house and there are no houses neAr I can rent. not.and pay that kind of petrol money and bills too they have a big car. I'm just trapped.

You are trapped but you are to an extent safe. Get yourself to the doctors and tell you mother that if you don't you will be more ill and unable to work and that wouldn't be good for anyone.

I cant go on the pills again until i am out of here i know what im like on them and i wouldnt survive being here with these people.

If you feel your pills cause side-effects then it would be worth having a chat with your GP. There may be other options for you.

It doesn't sound to me like your parents are being as helpful as you think they are - you pay petrol money at full whack for a big car (it's their choice to have a big car! 15p/mile is a fair donation for petrol - what do you have to pay them?); you pay for your mums gym membership (why?) but can't get to the gym unless they feel like taking you; and you are paying rent, I wouldn't be surprised to learn it was at or near market rates. No wonder you're despairing and fantasising about your 'old life' if so. What is your work pattern - is there any way at all, if the sums worked out, that you could use your income to rent a small flat, pay for childcare when needed, and get a debt management plan agreed with the help of CAB?

PS I mean rent a small flat near work/school of course...

As rightly said 'tough love' can go too far, but every idea or solution people of put up you have found a 'cant do' reason not to follow advice.

Can't drive? are you able to have lessons
No buses? get a bike.
You don't need a gym - get out and go walking, that will sort both your mind and your body out.

Depressed? See a doctor.

Don't like the pills? Ask to try different ones or a different dosage.

Sweetheart, if you are suicidal, you really need to talk to someone about this. Please see your GP.

sorry to have bothered you all thank you for advice sorry I'm not doing what everybody wants it's so easy to you. goodbye. please let this die

sleepy it will get better! Honestly.

Your at rock bottom so the only way is up. When I left my abusive partner , my life was in tatters. My esteem was so crushed I regularly concidered taking him back but I knew deep down I deserved some one who would be kind to me and love me.

I had to move in with my dgm with my dd. Exercise got me through. I got up very early in the morning and started running while dd was asleep. I become addicted to it. iPod on FULL blast so I couldn't hear my own depressing thoughts. Losing the weight I'd gained also made me feel good.

I Was depressed and it felt like an actual physical pain. But the running really really helped as the endorphins felt good!

I didn't want to take antidepressants so I started taking St. John's wort. I don't know if they worked as I started the running at the same time.

Breaking up with some one (even when they treat you like shit) can be like a grieving processes.

Try and look through the fog and see your self in a happy place and start makng small steps to get there.

I got there. Didn't ever think I would. I'm happy .

Suisidal thoughts- go see your GP. They could offer you some counciling.

Don't give up sleepy

Hi I went to bed last night but I've been in a very similar place to you feelings wise.

I think it took trying about 5 different kinds of anti-d's before I found one that helped without zombie side effects - so it could be worth exploring that. Have you asked to be referred to counselling/therapy by your Dr?? It is very helpful to explore and distinguish mult layers of hurt and loss one from another because there seems to be more going on than just splitting up with your ex.

Would cycling be an option - even if only a couple of times per week or is it way too far/very dangerous roads?

it is very difficult because your parents are definitely part of the reason why you are feeling so low and unable to try and start moving on but I can see the practicalties of moving out are overwhelming.

Am I correct in thinking you would need to save enough money to have a buffer to pay for childcare, rent etc whilst benefits were sorted? Have you spoken to any of the debt charities who will help for free to get repayments sorted and affordable etc? I also wonder about getting a crises loan in order to pay for childcare whilst waiting for CTC childcare element to kick in - this would make you less dependent on your parents? Also our council do a rent deposit loan scheme to help people rent privately - is that another option?

Do you have any friends locally who will come and visit you at your parents so at least you get to see a friendly face from time to time?

I can appreciate how hard you finding this from day to day but perhaps we could help you think of something towards a longer goal that you can achieve step by step. Eg arranging to talk to one of the debt charities and see if they can help you?

Sending you a hug, it's a lonely world at times

can you ride a bike?
(I couldn't, safely)
if so it would be good for fitness and transport

ah, random suggested that too :)

About 8 yrs ago I had the worst break up of my life. Took me nearly 3 years to get over it. Nothing helps but time- cliche as it is- just be kind to yourself and try to meet new people and throw yourself into new projects. I feel for you.

Oh and Prozac helped me. Agree with poster who suggested anti Ds.

You haven't bothered anybody sleepy please touch base so we know you are around. I wish I was your mum - you deserve better and in 20 odd years when you are through all this you can be the mum you would like to have for your DC. Don't leave them to rely on your mum and their dad.

Baby steps towards getting better and you will. What can we do to help if we haven't so far? Advice, suggestions, hand-holding, chat in the park - I would but suspect you aren't in SW London and I'm sad I can't come and give you a hug and tell you properly how much more you are worth ))))hugs((((