Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

To stop seeing this man...(red flags?)

46 replies

HandN · 06/02/2014 06:18

I've namechanged, but only jigged a couple of letters around so you should be able recognise me.

I've not long left a crap relationship myself, I have 2 children. I have met someone else...

We met about a month ago, exchanged lots of texts, meet up usually every other day, have had sex a few times. When we're together I literally can't breathe, he gives me butterflies and I've had that with anyone before, here's where the problem lyes...

He only broke up with his ex a day before we met, he also has 2 young dc (obviously not a problem). Everytime we are together he gets call after call from his ex, usually abuse. He has his own place but he says ex won't let him have his dc so he goes to hers after work and stays the night everytime which I find bizarre, apparently she doesn't let him leave. He doesn't communicate with me while he's there. I've suggested he gets solicitor advice if she won't allow him to have his own dc out of her sight.

Anyway, the point is I'm feeling used, I don't really know where I stand with him, he says he wants me but I'm not so sure. I'm feeling like knocking the whole thing on the head before it gets any further. What do you think?

OP posts:
LilyBlossom14 · 07/02/2014 13:12

I post this constantly, but you can do it online free Here if you wish.

AmazingJumper · 07/02/2014 13:51

It's not unreasonable for him to still have blurred boundaries with his ex - things can be complicated when a LTR breaks down.

Good to cool it off and it sounds like he agrees, I don't get why you think that is odd?

HandN · 07/02/2014 13:58

Odd because he's being persistent in perusing something with me, when I've made it clear not to contact me until he's sorted :)

OP posts:
Offred · 07/02/2014 14:03

You can do the freedom programme online btw but is not a substitute for proper RL support from WA I would say.

Offred · 07/02/2014 14:03

Oops! Wrong thread!

AmazingJumper · 07/02/2014 14:09

But he's said he'll wait till it's sorted?

HandN · 07/02/2014 14:47

Yes he said that last night, now he's text me 12 times already today.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 07/02/2014 17:19

Ignore him. Does he not understand you have ended the relationship. You have, haven't you ?

HandN · 07/02/2014 18:14

Yes AF I have, I haven't even text back today, feel kind of mean.

OP posts:
AndTheBandPlayedOn · 07/02/2014 18:34

It is not mean, HandN, it is called a boundary. That he is not respectful of it is him being mean...entirely his problem. Well done on not responding!

HandN · 07/02/2014 19:15

Thanks andthebandplayedon :)

Feeling positive!!

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 07/02/2014 19:21

You have not ended it if you are still letting him make you feel "mean"

Come on. Big Girl's Knickers required here.

AliceinWinterWonderland · 07/02/2014 19:49

he's texted you 12 times today?? I'd say that pretty much confirms that he's not worth the effort. My god! 12 times! What a pain!

HandN · 07/02/2014 21:19

Can I borrow your big girls knickers please AF Grin

Yes I know, 12 times! All soppy stuff aswell!

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 07/02/2014 21:20

We could both get in 'em at the same time. On leg each Smile

AmazingJumper · 07/02/2014 23:47

That'd stop him in his tracks Grin

HandN · 08/02/2014 07:10

Sounds like a plan to me haa!!!

OP posts:
AskBasil · 08/02/2014 10:01

God, 12 times?

What a bloody time waster. It's like being called by double glazing companies.

The very fact that he's doing this, shows that actually, he hasn't taken on board that it's over. This is his way of drawing you back in and you're doing the right thing to completely ignore.

HandN · 09/02/2014 08:57

Actual lol at ' like double glazing companies' Grin

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 09/02/2014 09:35

Have you got an iPhone? Block his number

Well done on getting out. Of the relationship. Not the big girl knickers

HandN · 09/02/2014 12:38

No I don't have an iphone, to be fair he's only text twice over the weekend. I have continued to ignore :)

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page