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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Text message in the middle if night on husbands phone

19 replies

lotti37 · 03/02/2014 13:08

Hi my husbands phone made a sound in the middle of the night prob about 3 on his personal phone. Not sure how many friends have this number as the phone is about 4 months old. Have not said anything to him but just a bit worried about it. What do you think? Thank you

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 03/02/2014 13:10

I think you should ask him

Does he have it set for news alerts ? It could be that.

Original poster
lotti37 · 03/02/2014 13:11

It was a whistle bird sound.

OP posts:
OnTheBottomWithAWomansWeekly · 03/02/2014 13:12

Or does it ting when he gets an email?

My phone half woke me at 3am, someone in the US had re-pinned one of my items on Pinterest, and the app automatically sends me an email when this happens (must go into my settings on Pinterest and stop this happening, it's a pain!)

LiberalLibertine · 03/02/2014 13:12

If he's hooked up to email or Facebook could be that. Ask him.

OnTheBottomWithAWomansWeekly · 03/02/2014 13:12

You can set lots of different sounds for different alerts - when DD rang me, my phone used to quack!

magoria · 03/02/2014 13:13

My phone buzzes at mid night one week before someone's birthday in my calendar. It also buzzes at midnight before I am due on.

Are you sure it was a text and not something else?

Showy · 03/02/2014 13:13

DH's phone does this in the night sometimes. He grunts and ignores it. Sometimes I get up and check in case it's important (he doesn't care, he would do the same with mine in the same situation). It's all sorts of stuff. Automated messages from his ISP, news updates, FB alerts, friends who happen to be up, delayed messages. I'd never jump to the conclusion that it was suspicious but the fact that you have suggests you have other worries. Is everything otherwise okay?

CajaDeLaMemoria · 03/02/2014 13:13

My phone goes off all night long.

Twitter alerts, usually. Sometimes texts from people in other countries, or out late. News alerts, Facebook...

I really don't think this is something to even think about, let alone worry about it.

Not to mention that if he was expecting middle-of-the-night private messages, he'd probably have put his phone on silent.

MissBattleaxe · 03/02/2014 13:15

My Dh's phone went off at midnight. It was a train alert.

flatmum · 03/02/2014 13:16

Also text messages often he delayed if your on a rubbish network or out of signal area for awhile. My DP sent me a text yesterday lunchtime saying are you picking up the kids? And I got it this morning at Half past 9

LadyMud · 03/02/2014 13:22

"What do you think?"
Unless there's a backstory you've not told us about, I think you're spending too much time on Mumsnet!

When I found a strange earring in the car last week, alarm bells started ringing. Then I calmed down and realised it was my own car Blush. My 85yo friend was glad to get her earring back!

ISeeYouShiverWithAntici · 03/02/2014 13:23

Mine chirrups in the middle of the night to alert me to the lastest bloody spam email. Damned thing.

I also get the odd middle of the night text that was actually sent in the middle of the afternoon Hmm

Is there something, some history, some other behaviours that have triggered this reaction in you? Why is asking him not something you felt you could do? "bloody hell, what was up with your phone last night?"

Original poster
lotti37 · 03/02/2014 13:23

Thanks everyone. I am sure it's fine .i know he's not on Facebook or Twitter. BBC new alerts sound like a news flash, might just ask him. He had an affair about 6.5 years ago which you never completely forget. Will just ask him . Thank you

OP posts:
NotNewButNameChanged · 03/02/2014 13:24

After 4 months, I'd probably given my new mobile number to all my friends. Occasionally I get texts arriving at silly o'clock that people had sent hours earlier. My internet provider sends me texts each month to tell me what my phone bill is going to be that month. Every now and again I get a missed call from numbers I don't recognise and will ignore them because they will either be a wrong number or a cold caller or some such.

I also leave my mobile on silent at night. In an emergency, that's what the landline is for.

If you are a bit worried about his phone beeping in the middle of the night, you either have many other things going on to make you suspicious and what you're telling us (without specifying) is that this is the tip of an iceberg, or you have serious insecurity issues.

NotNewButNameChanged · 03/02/2014 13:24

Ah, cross post with OP. It now makes more sense as to why you're worried.

SirRaymondClench · 03/02/2014 18:34

My phone is linked to my FB and unless I log out it can ping throughout the night (usually when I've just dropped off to sleep - grr!) so it could be something as innocuous as that!

GingerMaman · 03/02/2014 18:37

Gosh I just realised I used to reply to text messages in the middle of the night after DD was born, as that was the only chance I got. I don't think ill do that again as some people do leave their phones on loud

Original poster
lotti37 · 03/02/2014 21:24

Checked phone and no text just an email at 1.50 so think it must of been that. :-)

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 03/02/2014 21:28

Do you think you should talk to your H about how you are still struggling to trust him ?

Do you still talk about his infidelity, or are you supposed to be "over it" now ?

(I don't think you are, and I don't blame you)

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