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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Can I forgive affairs?

41 replies

golfwidow53 · 14/01/2014 23:08

Hi, I'm new to this so hope I don't go on too much but basically I found out my husband had an 18 month affair with a work colleague, when she messaged me on FB 9 months after it ended! It's now over a year since I found out and things have been difficult but my HB is trying his hardest to make things up to me! The OW gave me the name of another girl she was sure he had also had a relationship with and recently I contacted her as it was playing on my mind! Sure enough she confirmed they had sex a few times but not really a full affair. This seems to be around the same time things started with the OW!
Both said they would not be surprised if there were more and I am going mad wondering if I should try and find out or accept that thing's are better in our marriage recently and he has since changed his job and is not away so much.
We have been married 20 years ( happily, I thought!) and have a 14 year old DS.
I still love him and just want my life back!! Has anyone else managed to continue their marriage after so much deceit?
My DH is treating me very well and is very remorseful for his behaviour.

OP posts:
Jan45 · 15/01/2014 13:04

We all make mistakes yes but he seems to make the same ones, at least twice that you know about. He must be the talk of work.

We are all tempted, being in a relationship means you resist and it really shouldn't be that hard, even for a man, if you love your woman!

You obviously think he's worth another chance, just ensure he actually is committed to making it work and is just not sorry he was caught.

golfwidow53 · 15/01/2014 13:17

Thankfully he doesn't work there anymore or it would be impossible to carry on! He does still go away with the new job but only the odd night away every few weeks. He is constantly texting me and I do call his hotel room which I never did before!

OP posts:
Twinklestein · 15/01/2014 13:21

Both these women saying they 'wouldn't be surprised if there were more' are trying to tell you about his sexual behaviour OP.

It's possible for someone to change if they really want to, but it's not the change that's the problem so much as trust. How will you ever know whether he has really changed?

golfwidow53 · 15/01/2014 13:30

I know, its horrible watching every move & checking phones etc!

OP posts:
Decco · 15/01/2014 13:34

We broke up. He is living with his parents but with the OW now. It has taken me a couple of years to come to terms with what happened and I have read everything I could to try to make sense of it. He made his choice and though he is not a totally bad man, he did countless things he KNEW would devastate me and break my heart. That is all I see now. There are many posters on here who have helped me hugely (just by lurking to be honest). The future is bright without him. I would urge anyone to get away from lying cheats as quickly as possible now but of course with children and a whole life I know how hard it is. Not impossible though.

Phalenopsis · 15/01/2014 13:36

What advice would you give to a friend if she was in your situation?

I ask because I don't believe that these other woman/women are lying and the fact that he's being a good boy now means he wants the whole thing swept under the carpet and for you to be a good wife and forget all about it. That is, until he gets the next itch that he feels the need to scratch.

JoinYourPlayfellows · 15/01/2014 13:47

"I know we all make mistakes"

Having an 18 month relationship isn't a "mistake", is it?

It wasn't even the first time he chose to have a girlfriend on the side.

And that's just the ones that you know about sure sure. (Although you can be fairly certain that this pattern has been going on for your entire marriage.)

What you are looking for here is a way to go back to turning a blind eye to the faithless scumbag you married and that has always put himself before you and your children.

Maybe get him to buy you some diamonds or something? Do the "spa break" thing?

Your only way past this is accepting that the man you married is a philanderer and you have never, and will never be the only woman he is sleeping with.

Jan45 · 15/01/2014 14:03

If he can change great but I tend to agree with above, once a cheat.....

You're now going to spend your time following his every move, it's him who should be phoning you, not the other way around, he's the one who has broken the trust so it's up to him to do everything he can to ensure you feel loved and can believe he is trying to change, cos nobody can change overnight.

I can't keep thinking also that it's the green light for him, he lied to you for a year and a half and you only found out because the woman contacted you and yet, he's still with you, did you not even kick him out at the time?

Cabrinha · 15/01/2014 17:27

"he couldn't get out"?

I'd leave him over that line. Maybe some relationships can survive an affair.
Suspect those are the ones where the guilty party is contrite. Genuinely so. No churning out the usual clichés.

I don't expect you to like the OW, but please - vile, common, sluttish? Why are we hearing more insults about her than about the man who was supposed to respect and love you?

Dontlaugh · 15/01/2014 21:03

The OW may well deserve your contempt, but your husband deserves the nasty names- his behaviour is sluttish, common and vile. Before, during and after his affairs. You can decide to tolerate his philandering for your own reasons (lifestyle, money, children etc) but please do it with your eyes open. I.e. give up checking phone, whereabouts, etc. Accept there are other women. That is a choice I am sure many women make and I do not judge them for it. But don't expect the fairytale simply because you found out about his infidelity. He'll behave for a while, then simply start again. He's been forgiven, why wouldn't he?
Or you can get rid, which is scary. But a very real option. I hope you can make the right decision, whatever it is. And you are far too good for him.

tawse57 · 15/01/2014 21:18

It is human nature to want to know more golfwidow53 - even with things as hurtful and as tacky as this.

Part of why this happens is part of the grieving process which takes you through all the hurt, betrayal, reasoning, the asking of why, etc, etc, and, of course, the anger. In order to 'get it all out' you need to know more so that you can exhaust all the possible questions.

However, there should come a point when you simply have enough and either conciously or subconciously you will draw a line in the sand. What you decide to do at that point is, well, only time will tell.

From what you say it does sound as if my theory was right about the OW being scorned that he did not leave you for her - sounds like the details, locations, etc, that she has been telling you have indeed been designed to twist that knife of deceit further in your heart and hurt you. If she can't take him away from you then perhaps her thinking is that she will destroy the marriage or destroy you.

You have been terribly betrayed and are hurting but, as others have said on here, others have gone through similar things and come through it.

Yes, you may well decide to divorce him eventually but you may also decide that there is something worth fighting for. Only time will tell.

Best of luck with the counsellor on Thursday.

Dontlaugh · 15/01/2014 22:27

I find the focus on the OW pointless and distressing, Tawse.
OW's an adult, presumably single, knew what she was doing. DH of OP, on other hand, is married, with children, has cheated more than once and has shown no remorse, nor has he confessed. How has the OW become the villain?
Did she LAND on his dick? I doubt it.

Seventeenseventeen · 15/01/2014 23:05

I think it would be more sensible advice to the OP to suggest she not believe a word her H says rather than not believe the OW.

After all, there is only one proven liar involved so far, isn't there?

Viviennemary · 15/01/2014 23:15

I tend to agree with Seventeenseveteen. One affair, two affairs or more. It's the lying and deceit that is just so not acceptable. Yes people can forgive and move on but from what you have said you don't seem to be able to do that. And who can blame you. Not me for one. Is there any point in this endless torturing of yourself wanting to know the exact details. You have a perfect right to feel betrayed and hurt and to want to make sense of it all. Hope the counselling helps.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 16/01/2014 10:54

Trust is like a china plate. Break it and saying sorry and being adamant won't fix it. Spend time and effort fixing it with glue and making it look good as new and you'll always see the crack.

OP, your DH is a seasoned liar and adulterer. 18 months with someone is not some accidental mistake, it takes planning and cunning. Just having sex a few times is another affair. These other women seem to know him much better than you do and I think, by telling you they are others, they're doing you a favour. I'm sorry your self-esteem is so crushed and you believe yourself to be so trapped.

desperatelyseekingsolace · 16/01/2014 11:21

I am with Cogito on this. There is a big difference between a momentary lapse which is confessed to and at least two affairs of several months which require planning, preparation and a level of deceit which is chilling.

Only you can decide what to do with your marriage. But personally I don't think I could recover trust to continue after revelations like these.

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