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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How can someone change...or were they always like this?

5 replies

friendsyougottalovethem · 09/01/2014 19:03

NC as being stalked on here by exDP.

Split from my DP a month ago, nearly 6 yrs together. Not married, no kids but we have 2 each. large house, currently up for sale, overpriced as exFW wants as much equity as he can get. I have a large lump of equity that is all mine. Both stuck in the house till we sell.

I initiated the split but he wasn't happy anyway, he told me often he wanted out he is so bitter and angry. I sold the family car, in my name but paid for jointly, he was expecting to get a couple of thousand from the sale but once finance was paid there was nothing left. Threatened me with court.

Gave me a 5 page spreadsheet of household items to discuss, sets traps for me to see if I go in his room. Walks around the house whistling wtf??? Isn't getting home till 8-8.30pm - don't know where he is. had a date at the weekend too so presume he's with a woman??

I've been shopping/cooking for him but I just can't be bothered with that so I've told him I'm not doing it anymore - now he says he's not paying his half of the mortgage and that I'm a childish, pathetic cow for refusing to cook for him.

Why should I cook his fuckin meals? He doesn't do ANYTHING in the house anymore.

Only obligation I have is to pay my share of the bills. Have no obligation to him anymore.

OP posts:
Twinklestein · 09/01/2014 19:26

He threatens not the pay the mortgage because you won't cook for him & you're childish ??

Hmm... roll on selling your house.

JupiterGentlefly · 09/01/2014 19:28

People unfold. Great article on the baggage reclaim site which explains why 'they were lovely in the beginning'

friendsyougottalovethem · 09/01/2014 19:43

Oh he was lovely in the beginning...but not now!

OP posts:
Twinklestein · 09/01/2014 19:44

Unravel might be more apt...

CogitoErgoSometimes · 09/01/2014 23:16

I don't think people do change fundamentally. Everything he's displaying now he will have displayed before, only possibly you won't have taken so much notice of it because it was either mild or directed at others

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