friend split up from dh - don't know whether to send little note or leave it...

[bin]

what's best, don't want her to feel I'm being ignorant and don't want her to feel I'm being OTT. We meet up about once a year or so due to mutual friends and so sometime I have to acknowledge it. really feel for her and the children but she is not one to make a fuss over anything very practical always. What would you do/want?

I would send a note. Does she know that you know? I think it can be hard to tell people of a break up..If you let her know that you are thinking of her, she will find it easier to get in touch if she needs to talk.

please send a note. its amazing how it will make her feel

I think I'd be inclined to send her a 'how are you?' type text or note but also fill it with info on yourself/family so you're not totally dwelling on her situation. I'd make it clear I knew and cared but without going into teh whole 'you must feel terrible' type thing. Suggesting a meet up when she's free may also show you mean what you say (ie you care!) HTH

Definitely send a note

Send a note no matter how short then follow it up. Had lots of emails but would have been great to have a follow up call a few days after when you know she would have got it.

I personally would send a note/email and make some form of practical offer - could you invite her and the kids to come and stay, or offer to take them off her hands for a day, or ask if she'd like you (probably just you - not you and family) to come and stay for a night. even if it comes to nothing it will mean a lot to her.

Will send a note, thanks. We should be meeting in October but will offer somehow to meet before if she would like without the others. Just not sure how to word it.

Just say really sorry to hear you are splitting up and would like to keep in contact. Its quite hurtful when people dump you following a split. Even if you do end up siding with ex-dh its a nice recognition of what the other person is going through. Following my split my ex's sister did not bother contacting me and totally sided with ex. A quick phone call/note would have maintained good relations. She did write a year or so later but it was far too late by then.

I would send a pretty card with a little note just saying 'I know you're going thru' a tough time, and just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you'.

When my dh left, a few people sent me little cards or notes to say they were thinking about & offering help. They meant a great deal to me at the time. I'd definitely go for it - nice of you to be so thoughtful bin.