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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Too many fish in the sea??

6 replies

welshnat · 03/01/2014 19:47

I signed up to Plenty of Fish yesterday and have had a lot of online conversations already. My problem is that I feel really bad speaking to 5/6 different men at the same time. But how do I decide who to continue talking to? It's very early days and they all seem really nice and genuine. 3 have already asked for my number, and said they hope to meet up soon.

What should I do? Just meet up with them all if I like them or just with one? I know this seems really trivial but I know I wouldn't like to be strung along, although I'm sure these men are messaging other women too.

OP posts:
ALittleStranger · 03/01/2014 19:51

You need to join the dating thread...

But, carry on messaging as many as you think are interesting, meet as many as you can bear the idea of spending an hour with and then brace yourself for the fact that you'll only want a second date with one or two.

Discussions around exclusivity are for after you've DTD.

ParsleyTheLioness · 03/01/2014 20:27

Personally, I would keep talking to them, but maybe not give your no out for a while. I found they self-selected or showed tendencies towards knobbiness all by themselves Grin Just be alert for when things don't seem to add up. Your gut instinct is usually right. Nothing wrong with meeting up with more than one, see what you think. It's like part two of the interview process!

Beccawoo · 03/01/2014 20:45

I met my DP on there, we've now been together 1.5 years and just moved in together. However, doesn't mean I didn't chat to others when starting off. There are a lot of men on there only after one thing (!) but nothing wrong with chatting online and going for coffee with as many or as few as you like before you many any commitment about dating anyone. I had lunch with another man before meeting DP, but although he was lovely, knew he wasn't my type so was just honest. Good luck, hope you find someone amazing :0)

Beccawoo · 03/01/2014 20:45

I met my DP on there, we've now been together 1.5 years and just moved in together. However, doesn't mean I didn't chat to others when starting off. There are a lot of men on there only after one thing (!) but nothing wrong with chatting online and going for coffee with as many or as few as you like before you many any commitment about dating anyone. I had lunch with another man before meeting DP, but although he was lovely, knew he wasn't my type so was just honest. Good luck, hope you find someone amazing :0)

Seasidegirly · 04/01/2014 03:13

As soon as I met him off Pof - I knew I couldn't chat to anyone else - I deleted my profile after about 4 dates

Original poster
welshnat · 05/01/2014 08:45

Thanks for the advice everyone. I didn't know there was a dating thread so I think I will be getting my bum over to there. It's nice to know that you've had some success stories Grin

OP posts:
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