I think DP is cheating again

[lauralou85]

The secrecy with his phone and constant texts have started up again to the same woman. I've posted on here before about this, he had an affair in the summer but I forgave him and we got back together. Things were ok for a while but I knew he was still texting the OW. After I confronted him he promised me he would stop all contact with this woman but it's started again. Last night he was laying in bed texting her (he thought I was asleep but could see her name at the top of the screen. I feel so so sad as I love him and his DS and we had a lovely Christmas but now it all feels fake. I have no proof of the texting as I don't know the pass code to his phone and the texts won't show up on the iPad now (he changed it so I couldn't see his texts on there) so confronting him will be difficult as he will probably just say it's friendly texting. He doesn't seem interested in having sex with me despite me losing 2 stone in weight and buying all new lingerie and nice clothes. He knows how much it upsets me when he texts the OW but obviously not enough to stop.

What an absolute piss take! He's not only having his cake and eating it but you are cutting up into little pieces and spoon feeding him...whilst wearing sexy underwear!

It's not his choice who he choses, but anyway, you've given him the choice of you or you and the ow and he's taken both.
Really the decision is yours...it's either you or him. Either he continues to eat cake or you chose your mental health and self esteem. Unfortunately you don't have the choice of your relationship as you don't have one.
You aren't together in a way that anyone would else would consider having a partner.
Just because he "chose" to live with you, doesn't mean he chose you, as he doesn't have any respect for you.

Just think of the amazing weight loss and promotion as the start of the new you. The new you who puts themselves first while you heal, so that you attract the right type of person next time.

You need to remember-he was a cheat when you got together-you can't make someone stray if they have love and morals!

Been there OP. It sounds like the rules weren't put in place after the first time; i.e complete transparency ( all pass codes, passwords etc to be openly available to you) If there's nothing to hide there's no excuse. Also zero, and I mean ZERO, contact with the OW. Delete numbers, block her on FB etc. If he wants to heal your relationship, these aren't much to ask. It's not even the difficult bit. I'm two years in and our relationship is better because my DH has had to make a big effort to help me learn to trust him, rather than accept it as a given.It has been really hard at times, but it is possible.

You break my heart, trying your best and having to pretend to be asleep whilst he lies next to you betraying your trust.Take back the control and set your boundaries very clearly. You won't regret it.