Feeling really hurt by my ex's behaviour

[brun3tt3]

I'm currently really struggling with my ex. He sees our daughter for an hour or so every few weeks, he spends all his money on going out and on cannabis (I kicked him out because of this), he gets angry when I say anything to him and makes me feel worthless and alone. I want him out of my life but don't want him to get away with not supporting our daughter. I'm conflicted . I can't win! Is anyone else going through this? How on earth do you move on?

Does he smoke cannabis when he has responsibility for your daughter? How old is your daughter, can you ask some gently probing questions to see what she does with ex when she's with him?

Contact the CSA for child maintenance & you don't even need to discuss money with him when its all up & running. The CSA will get the cash from him & transfer it into your bank account. If he pisses the rest of his money up the wall then its not your problem.

Stop all unneccessary contact with him. Only text or email to confirm access arrangements & if he contacts you in the meantime then ignore him. Don't allow him to make you feel worthless.

If you think there is a chance he is using drugs when he has parental responsibility for your DD then explore the contact centre option. Then you won't have to see him & you know your DD is safe while still having a relationship with him.

Don't say nothing to him, she might be over by now. Apologizing to him will give his hope and hurt his more. Better if you just stay away.

My daughter is 18 months and she tries her best to tell me everything like 'daddy naughty'. I try not to involve her in it because she adores him. The whole situation is so sad. I've even spoken to his mum who agrees with me. He doesn't have her on his own, either he comes to mine or sees her at his parents. Although when I have dropped her off with him I have been suspicious that he has already been smoking it, luckily his mum is there and his sister. Thank you for your advice. Sometimes you are so involved in a situation that you can't step back and be objective. This isn't how I imagined things to turn out.

she is 18 months old
she would adore him if he had just murdered someone
she doesnt have any ideas at this age she doesnt know what is naughty except very simply

so you have to have ideas and take responsibiility for her

dont communicate with him.
make sure contact is supervised as youa re doing
contact csa if he has a job for maintenance