Moving in with parents - tips and advice?!

[AnuvvaMuvva]

I'm moving in with my elderly (71 and 73) y/o parents in about a weeks' time, with my young DS (10 and 5), while I buy a house round the corner. It'll be for at least 3 months, maybe slightly longer.

We're a very close family (my brother lives next door) and can talk openly and honestly about EVERYTHING so nothing festers unsaid!

I'll have a huge rom with an en suite, the boys will share one bedroom and have a playroom too and their own bathroom. There's a big garden, and two dogs.

I'm not anticipating any problems. I know dad will welcome the rent money and the boys are excited. But any tips from people who've done it?

Thank you xx

My friend moved home when pregnant and never quite moved out again. Her baby is now a strapping 7yo. Very indulged, and dare I say spoiled 7yo who has 3 adults pandering to his every whim.

All I'd say is: make sure you retain a handle on discipline.

That sounds quite nice...

My parents are good at discipline - they're very good at rewarding good behaviour with praise, but not tolerating silly stuff for a second.

Like on Boxing Day night, we were all playing a board game and DS2 (5) was being silly when he threw the dice - throwing them across the table, etc. my Dad told him not to be silly, my brother showed him the right way of doing it, and when DS2 did it right, we all clapped and cheered. Every time.

If it'd been just me, I'd not have said anything about the dice, but it ended up being really good. He felt epic afterwards.

I'm really looking forward to it. I realise it'll be hard though, so I wanted to get tips. Maybe I'm just looking for trouble though..?

Have you discussed who will be cooking etc? I would want to know how much help my parents wanted and how much theywanted me to let them get on with it.

Kitchen issues are the biggest thing, I would say. Will you be sharing cooking with your parents? Will you be cooking for everyone when you do, or just for you and your children?
Get this sorted out as soon as you can, in whatever way suits you best - 2 adult women sharing a kitchen can be a very quick way to fall out!

Also, laundry - will you all be pitching in together, or will you be doing yours and the boys' washing, and leaving them to do theirs?

They sound very silly little niggles but really, because you're going to have to share kitchen and laundry space, it's as well to sort these things out up front, I feel.

Yes, I think you need to sort out who does what. Cooking, shopping, laundry, cleaning.
Maybe get a cleaner if you can to make things easier?

There is a cleaner and some of my rent will go towards paying them to do extra.

We've said we'll meal-plan each week, and take turns to cook. Dad does all the cooking now, mum hates it.

Mum said she'd do our laundry but I've told her no. We create MOUNTAINS of it, so I'll do it myself. I'll do their stuff too if there is any. (It's easy here - they have a tumble dryer so it all gets done in one evening rather than hanging round drying for days).

I've been here all Xmas and done as many little jobs as I can - loading/unloading dishwasher while waiting for kettle to boil, making dinner, getting the DC to lay the table/fetch the logs, etc.

Dad does online food-shopping but I'll nip out to do the little bits. He can't walk very well so it's easier for me to do that.

They keep saying they don't want me to spend all day cleaning - they want me to be working (I work from home) and earning money for he and the DC! I'm so used to doing everything at the moment (as a single mum) that, tbh, just having other people around to chat to the DC, etc, is a massive help.

That should say "earning money for me and the DC"! Not he.

Sounds good then :)

Thank you