How hard is the 'first christmas'!

[catkin14]

This is first christmas since split from exh.

For myself I am not bothered but I am so aware of all the traditions we had, even though exh barely got involved in them, and for this being the first one for my DC away from his DF. Been mid teens doesnt help him either.

I have tried very hard to make it good for him and have a lot planned.

Any advice?? : (

Sounds like you are doing just fine to me

I would make sure you "let him be" a good amount too, love. Just my opinion. Teens need alone time, let him come to you under his own steam.

It seems like you are doing fine. Just keep doing the best you can do, and all will be well.

Sure, it is going to feel strange for you both - but that doesnt mean it is going to feel unhappy in the slightest.

It can be whatever you make of it. So enjoy it

Merry Christmas xx

It's my first C/mas too since H left. My DS is 20 but has been moody for past few days and today he said he doesn't know why he feels so bad but I understand so have left him alone but made sure he knows he can chat to me.

I suppose what I'm saying is that I agree with MFC in letting him be if that's what he needs.

It does sound like you have worked hard to make it special and I hope you and your DS have a good day tomorrow. Just think like I am, next year will be so much better! x

Its my first C/mas too since our split, and H has the DCs for Christmas so its my first one alone. I think what you're doing sounds great.

From my perspective I'm also aware of my grief that, though our DCs are teens, there is no one here to put out stockings etc, - so I suppose just being aware of your own feelings and sense things are a bit awry too. Just wanted to stop by and say there are lots of us in the same situation. Good luck.

Thanks all.
For me its going to be a great christmas! so I am happy but aware that its odd for DC.
We have a good day planned tomorrow and his older brothers will be there too.
But yes I miss the stuff of little children too I suppose.
Happy Christmas to you all first timers, we will all be fine and soon there will be a new year to look forward to!

First Christmas here for me too.

Mine are a mix of ages 17, 8 and 4.
I've tried to set new traditions this year, panto, winter wonderland, church, Xmas eve pjs

They are with me in the morning then at exh and his parents from 12. I'm going to the pub for dinner with my mum who is currently driving me nuts
It will be odd but a large part of me is relieved I won't have to spend the day talking to exh relatives, feeling anxious and him generally being a bit of a nob jockey

Merry Christmas to you all, keep smiling

Another first timer here :)

So far so good - we all had a wobble earlier but fine now.

Dinner for tomorrow all prepped - just needs cooking :)

Lots of fun stuff planned - silly, loud stuff which exh hated :)

It's my second Christmas and, actually, it was all pretty ok last year (we'd only separated 6 weeks earlier) but actually, it was fine.

You make your own new traditions, let the kids get on with doing their own things and just have a nice day.

It's my first Christmas too, DDs are at their dads tonight and were last night too. I can't wait til 11.30 tomorrow when he brings them back. Feel strange as we are going to my mums for dinner so don't feel i have them to myself at all. Will do it differently next year i think. Major wobble earlier, but only a few more hours to get through now and hopefully I'll sleep most of those :)
Merry Christmas to you all xx

Yes I want it completely different next year.
Have bent over backwards to make it normal for dcs but exh has not repaid that favour.

My first one too - found out Friday he'd moved in with her. I'm fine though and be glad when he's out of my life for good. No kids together thank god!

First Christmas for me too....so hard, kids are away to their dads in an hour and I will be spending the rest of the day alone....

Cant wait for the day to be over TBH