Internet Persona's

[Wantthatone]

I have just discovered that my friend leads an 'alternative' life on the internet, her husband told me and is worrying that she may be suffering from depression or some kind of mental illness. Basically a while ago he designed a forum website aimed at young people and teenagers. To get people talking she joined up herself and started creating conversations...some of which never recieved any replies so she made up another character, a 16 year old school girl.

The school girl character DID get replies so she dropped her real profile and just continued to use the fake one, she took it too far however when she began chatting to a 17 year old boy on msn who she had 'met' through the forum. She led this boy on to believe that he had a chance with her, she downloaded photos of models and passed them off to him as photos of herself which he truely believed, they exchanged phone numbers and she would arrange to meet him only to make up some excuse at the last minute. Her hubby started to question it and asked her to stop and he then thought she had until he found out that she had continued it in secret but had created a full life story for herself, she invented an 18 year old boyfriend who beat/raped and tortured her...her father and brother also abused her, her best friend bullied her and hurt her...the list went on. She had created this 16 year old beauty queeen who had been abused and hurt by everyone around her. She had even began chatting to this 17 year old boy on msn as her evil brother, the friend, the father...5 or 6 different characters chatting to him.

The whole thing has died down alot lately but yesterday he found a "story" hidden on the pc that she had written about a woman who was in a band and had an affair with the singer but already had a boyfriend who beat her etc...its like she is obsessed with violent men but has never really been in that situation herself.

She lost her father when she was young and was sexually abused by a male family member as a child, we're wondering if this has something to do with it?? any insight appretiated.

The fact that she was abused as a child has probably something to do with it, has she had any counselling for this?
Has her dh confronted her about what was found yesterday?

She has never had councelling and has only very recently told close people about it.

Her hubby hasn't confronted her about the band story but the whole story she made up about the abusive family members etc he did, he told her it was wrong to upset this kid into thinking that a person he feels close to is being tortured on a regular basis, she told him she knows its wrong and will kill her character off! she doesnt seem to realise what she's doing or the effect it could have on this 17 year old.

Another thing is that from the age of about 13 she has been obsessed with this singer from the band (the same one in the story), he is actually a real person in a relatively unknown band but as far as we know she has never met him. When she was 16 she ran away from home and told all her family that she had gone to him (he also ended up fictionally beating her up), she still says to this day that it happened but we all know it's just not true.

How do you help someone like this?

It sounds like she needs help of some sort. Its not right to behave like this and especially when other people are getting involved on the internet. Could her dh suggest going for help or counselling for what has happened to her in the past. Maybe if she addressed these issues it would help her to move on.