Friend gone AWOL and then sends me a Christmas card?!

[NewBeginningsSnoopy]

So a bit of back history- friends at school and during college years. Buddies. Went to her wedding. Recent break up with my ex. 2 years or so ago. Talked to her about it at the time. Saw her a small bit at the time. She had just had a baby. Haven't seen her since! Tried to meet up with her in July. Not a word really. Given up trying to meet up with her. She texts that basically she has no time. She's very good friends with an old work friend of my ex. Got a Christmas card and got her address to send one back but I'm kind of hurt that she has put our friendship on a yearly 'Christmas card'. Full stop. She knows I'm going through a hard time. I don't expect her to support me but its not exactly the time to ignore me surely? Feel like not sending her one back just to show her that its not ok with me. Or else just send one back to keep the 'peace' and forget about her.

May be she does not realise how hurt you are and genuinely thinks sending an Xmas card is a good way of kind of touching base.

It is kind of flakey of her but indicates that she does still want you in her life in some way. Had she not bothered I would be more hurt thinking she definitely doesn't want to bother any more.

Um. Honestly? Life moves on. You haven't seen her in two years, she's had a baby since then... she's told you she doesn't have time to meet up at the moment. In the nicest possible way - she's not as into you now as you are to her. And that's OKAY. She's allowed. We don't have to be best friends with people for the rest of our lives, some friendships are just for a season. Just send a card back. Maybe life will let you get more in touch again in the future, maybe it won't.

As a very flakey person who struggles to stay in touch, and lost several friends because I was so unavailable after ds was born.… she sent you a card for a reason. It's sad that she hasn't managed to be there for you at a bad time, and no doubt you will feel differently about the friendship, but I wouldn't drop it altogether - send her a card. Say you'd like to meet up (if it's true) and maybe make a fresh start. Give her a chance to make it up to you.

Is it possible that she got PND? And then didn't feel that she could contact you till now?

I'm kinda paranoid that the friend of my ex has poisoned her against me. Well that sounds overly dramatic but you all know what I mean.

It's ok. I'm not really into her either. I suppose Christmas cards it is then!