Hi all, would appreciate opinions on this.
My FIL is an alcoholic who beats his wife, last incident was over the New Year and has been quiet since then. I don't visit anymore after March 2005 when FIL fought with DH in the same room my DD was (then 3 months) asleep! DH is still being civil to his Dad (after a fall out last year) and wants to visit them next week as his school holidays start, only now he wants me to start visiting again (despite the fact they will never visit us whilst we are staying with my parents).
So I agreed to go, mug that I am, however yesterday DH's brother called to let him know that his Mum wants to leave FIL (again; she does this regularly, then decides it's too much hassle, I used to be sympathetic, but that has run out!!). The reason for this is that FIL is drinking heavily again, DH wasn't supposed to know as his Mum doesn't want to be pressured by DH into leaving (he told her last time, that if she chooses to go back to FIL he would not be helping her next time, sounds mean, but he was trying to shock her into leaving...didn't work).
The upshot of this is I really don't think any of us should go next week whilst FIL is having one of his 'episodes', especially as I haven't spoken to him in at least a year and he knows I can't stand him, I am sure this would make things worse. My main worry is that I don't EVER want my baby (now 18 months) to be exposed to drinking and violence (I was scared at 30 yrs old), DH agrees, but still will not cancel, has now said "we'll see what happens over the week, then decide".
If I had my way DD would never even be in the same town as my FIL, do you think that I am being over-protective? DH used to be as horrified as me, but now is fed up with my views as he feels that I am too critical and that "he is my Dad after all". I do understand most people love their parents no matter what, but I just don't want my DD involved. All opinions welcomed!!!