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Original poster

How do you let one one know you're interested?

10 replies

Doobiedoobedoobie · 14/12/2013 16:37

I split up with DH a few months ago so still early days but I'm getting my confidence back again slowly.

There's a guy at work who I don't see that much, (different teams so really only see each other in meetings/ at lunch etc) but who I get on really well with. He's single, I have NO idea if he likes me or not but we chat a lot and have a laugh together.

How can I signal that I'm interested? I cannot flirt. Really, I'm rubbish at it and generally quite socially awkward though people at work wouldn't know this about me as I'm a bit of a 'fake till you make it' type in the workplace. And, as I say, I have no idea if he's at all interested in me so I want to make it known that if he asked me out I'd say yes without making it obvious that I like him iyswim in case he doesn't and I make him uncomfortable.

Argh! I haven't dated anyone in sooooo many years, this whole thing is terrifying!

OP posts:
Original poster
Doobiedoobedoobie · 14/12/2013 16:38

Sorry, in the title that should say someone, obviously. Stupid iPad.

OP posts:
AuntySib · 14/12/2013 16:44

I don't think you need to do anything other than be friendly when you see him. If he's interested I'm sure he'll let you know.

MyBachisworsethanmybite · 14/12/2013 16:59

Well, yes, you could hang around waiting for him to notice you like him.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 14/12/2013 17:11

I believe it's traditional to ask .... 'do you fancy meeting up after work?' It's not the 19th Century. You can take the initiative.

Original poster
Doobiedoobedoobie · 14/12/2013 17:16

No no no, I can't. Really, honestly, I can't, you have no idea how awkward I am in situations like this. It's a wonder I ever got married in the first place tbh Hmm

OP posts:
CogitoErgoSometimes · 14/12/2013 19:43

Faint heart never won fair co-worker.... :) What have you got to lose?

StarsUponThars · 14/12/2013 19:48

Just ask him out for a drink already Smile. By email if that's easier.

Hmm, maybe not company email.

RatherBeRiding · 14/12/2013 20:10

Does he know you're available - that is, does he know your marriage has broken up and you are now a free woman again?

If so and you really can't say "fancy a coffee sometime" (and I'm with you on this one - could never ask a bloke out!!) then you need to drop some hints. How about how such-and-such a film has just been released but none of your friends want to see it, or one of your friends has been raving about such-and-such a pub or restaurant but you don't know who to go with. If he's interested he should take the hint quick enough - if he isn't then you will have your answer without putting too much of yourself out there, iyswim

MadeMan · 15/12/2013 00:02

I don't know what you could do to let him know you like him, without you being blatantly obvious and telling him. I am complete crap at reading 'hints' women throw at me, so if he's anything like me you might be waiting a while. Even if a woman was throwing her knickers at me and pointing to her arse, I'd probably just be thinking, "What's that crazy fool playing at?"

I only ask out women I fancy and it generally has nothing to do with any signs that the woman likes me. I think a lot of the time men just try their luck and we don't see any signals that women may be sending us.

Blondie1984 · 15/12/2013 00:11

Do you know what he likes? Or are you having an Xmas party?

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