You were all right about H

[Unknownmember]

I've posted so many times about H. All of you told me to leave him.

He had another Christmas party today. This was a Christmas award day. It started at 10. Last year when he went to this, he got so drunk, his boss was furious with him, they put him in a cab which he left and luckily a co worker saw. She stayed with him and called me to come and get him at 10pm when both kids(under 2) we're in bed. It was so embarrassing.

So after all his million of promises that he would go to the party/event he was invited to and then come straight home. No going out afterwards. That was his choice.

This party finished at 4pm. But apparently he 'needed' to go to the after party. Which is really him out with friends drinking more. He first said he would be home by 1am which I disagreed with. He then promised 10.30. He's now text me to say he's staying with friends.

With all our history, I'm fed up. I'm tired of broken promises. Of going around in circles. Of him not growing up and realizing he has responsibilities. That his drinking has ruined us. But his enjoyment always comes first.

I'm booking myself in a hotel for the night. I need space to think

He can go to our friends Christmas party without and explain where I am. He can look after the kids.

I have had it.

The key thing to remember about having a relationship with an alcoholic is that there is nothing you can do to change his behaviour. You need to prioritise yourself and the children, and leave him (or get him out of the house - get legal advice on which is the better option). Addicts stop when they choose to do so - and some don't stop but carry on with their addiction until they die. None of it is your fault. None of it is your responsibility.

I remember your previous posts, OP. Wasnt he prone to wet the bed when he came home, too? What really comes across here is, he isnt going to listen to you on this because your opinion doesnt matter to him. So sorry to hear things have reached this stage; you must have the patience of a saint to have put up with it for so long. Are you OK with him looking after your DCs? just wondering if he'd do this in a drunken state. I hope you do leave - hopefully it will be a big wakeup call for him, then you can set out what needs to happen for your relationship to work. If its not a wakeup call for him well then..at least you have your answer.