Is it best to give him what he wants?

[Wishuponastar011]

I know this seems really really childish and immature. I've been talking to an old friend, we're really getting on, and have seen each other in person a few times but have been texting and talking on the whole a lot the ash few weeks.
Anyway, he's subtlety said that he's interested in meeting up for 'some fun' I'm more than happy to so this haha, we're both single and grown ups, but I think I'm starting to gain feelings for him more than what I should have of we're just going to be fuck buddies.
I do like him, and I want to spend time with him whether that is just for fun or more dating and forming a relationship with him friends or otherwise.

Any advice as to what I do? Shall I go to his knowing that that's what he wants and I'm more than willing to do? Should I tell him I want more? Or just hope for the best?!

I wouldn't....if you were BOTH emotionally uninvolved, I would say go ahead. As it is, you could be hurt. You have the insight to see it from the start. If he really has deeper feelings for you, he will see them in time, without the sex.

If you tell him you are hoping for more, you run the risk of him 'persuading' you it may turn out the way you want, to get the sex... (got the t.shirt).

In ANY dating situation there is always the risk that one is more keen than the other or that you want different things. Say at the outset that you're not interested in casual if that's important to you. Then again, you could meet up for this 'fun' and discover that, once the long-distance thrill/anticipation built up by the texting and talking turns into something more tangible, you don't feel the same way about him at all.

The irony is,by having a FWB relationship with him you will devalue yourself in his eyes and the potential for it to become a long lasting relationship will be less.
He will think(wrongly) that if you are willing to have sex with him on that basis you will do it with anyone.
So,fine for a shag but not wife or long term partner material.
If you want a proper relationship with him,cool things,wait and see what happens.
Then decide.

I don't think what Abby says is necessarily right, but this is definitely true: It's very very unlikely he will change his mind. If you would be happy with FWB, then go, but if you know you wouldn't, steer clear. Be honest!

If you go for the sex anyway, then be aware that the biggest chance is you'll get hurt - if you're prepared to take the risk for the sake of having the sex, then fine - perfectly valid choice. But don't go there with dreams of convincing him to fall in love happily ever after, because it's very improbable that that would happen.

Make absolutely sure that IS what he's angling for. It could be pretty embarrassing to explain that you're not after a FWB situation if that's not what he actually means.

I think this will put your friendship on a different footing now whatever you decide to do. FWB is going to sting if he's dictating the pace and you're hoping for more.

What is the worst case scenario, after getting intimate he brushes you off completely or you fall head over heels but he still sees other women and refuses to be exclusive? If you are keen enough to risk that and prepared to see him on his terms there's no saying whether he'll be receptive to the idea of developing this into something more serious or not.

Just consider what you gain from this and if you go ahead take it one encounter at a time.

Actually, at the risk of over-thinking, your title 'shall I give him what he wants' implies a bit too much passivity on your part, as if he calls the shots, and not you IUSWIM?