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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I going mad? I feel like I'm going mad.

7 replies

Dirtybadger · 11/12/2013 13:09

Another thread.

During the night I checked DP's skype. Found out that the girl who I saw had sent him rude pictures last year (summer 2012) had actually been talking to him for several months and they met up a few times. She's only young and she bats him off a lot. I don't believe anything happened. More because of her than him. She is a virgin and to be honest doesn't seem as into it as him.

I confronted him with this today. Overnight I took his door key off the ring and then whilst he was at work sent him a message telling him not to come back. Not to contact me. Contact my brother if he needs anything. And told him what I knew about.

Obviously straight away he turned up. The door is bolted. He knocked then rang me. I hung up. I text him saying contact my brother he said he didn't have his number (whoops nor do I). I answered the phone eventually and we spoke for an hour. After I pointed out he hadn't said sorry, he said sorry. He said sorry several times after. Told me he loved me. That he didn't know what to say or do. That he was scared. Scared of being outside (huh?). Scared of moving to a new place (he's taken a job up north, I was due to join him in summer).
I pointed out how bloody scary it would be for a woman living with a man she couldn't even look at, or trust. How horrible it would be to have to know that your DP can't go out because you won't let them.

His excuse, essentially, was that when I gave him the opportunity to be honest a year ago (after finding something else out and splitting up), he didn't remember the prostitute bit because it had been nothing and 6 month ago and just for a thrill. And that he thought, because I knew about the pictures, that I already knew about the other girl and the meet ups. I pointed out that he (this was a bluff) met up with her AFTER I found the pictures so of course I didn't know. He didn't deny this and I think it'd be well remembered if he did or did not cut contact as requested by me at the time (pretty laid back I was!).

Anyway, I now don't know what to do. He's apologised and told me he won't do it again. He hasn't done anything since the last time I spoke to him (maybe true) and that nothing physical has ever happened. He admitted one other thing and I thanked him for being honest- that a girl kept phoning, texting and trying to add him on social media. I actually already knew this because I'd been rejecting her friend requests and seeing that he'd been doing the same.

I asked him about one other woman. An older woman he'd text (only say one saying 'are you ok?') and is friends with on Facebook. Pointed out it's really odd and not on to add local women you don't know. Obviously it reeks of intention and he said yes ok maybe that's weird. MAYBE THAT'S WEIRD?

I asked him to think about what he'd do if I was his mother. I said if he was my brother in law or father, I would be battering him with a bloody stick but because it was my problem he was getting off lightly.

I don't know what to do now. He is ringing back in a few hours. I said leave me for some time because I firstly need to think and also I have 2 assignments for college due in tomorrow which is not helpful. And work this evening. And I have to take the dog out but am too scared to leave the house in case he sees me or takes her or something. Although he doesn't have anywhere for her to live so maybe he wouldn't.

Just need some hand holding and shaking, please! I am doing the right thing, right? I contacted an old friend on FB and she said I was right and to take some time and really think thing through. Good advice?

Apologies for such a long message this has literally just happened and writing it is helping me cope.

Oh and I jumped on him like a badger (dirtybadger?) down the phone when he said he'd been spending a lot of money on porn sites because we hadn't been having much sex. Yes because of something he did 6 months before, idiot! He did then say no no not your fault just explaining.

OP posts:
Donkeylovesmarzipanandmincepie · 11/12/2013 13:19

He is explaining and excusing himself ad nauseam but a partner who contacts a prostitute just for a thrill and spends so much time communicating with random females isn't really DP material is he.

"Sorry" must be the most repeated word in his vocabulary. It sounds hollow coming from him.

Flangeofmingetown · 11/12/2013 13:30

Life is too short to be full of this drama. Enough.

Dump him and move onto better things.

Dirtybadger · 11/12/2013 13:31

Thanks Donkey. I am trying to maintain the anger because if the anger goes apathy and guilt seem to take over and I know that it will just lead to me accepting everything for an easy life like last time. Hard to stay mad, I just don't seem to be capable of being as angry as I think I should be.

OP posts:
Donkeylovesmarzipanandmincepie · 11/12/2013 14:13

I don't know how old you are OP but if at the back of your mind you had thought he might be a potential dad, so can't face finishing with him for fear of having wasted time, please please wake up. The best partner is someone you can believe in, s/he is trustworthy and makes you happy, you share the same ideals and values. Not someone you can't trust out of your sight who crushes your self-esteem because you're not quite good enough to hold their interest.

Donkeylovesmarzipanandmincepie · 11/12/2013 14:16

Obviously you ARE good enough, in fact from what I've read here he is punching above his weight, so say goodbye and move on.

Lavenderhoney · 11/12/2013 17:07

He knows if he gives you time to think you might cave in.

Text him and tell him not to contact you for two weeks. You will drop his things at his mums in the meantime if he needs clothes. Then turn your phone off. If he comes round and bothers you hammering on the door, call the police.

Otherwise you'll be up all night waiting for his call/ talking endlessly. Its thinking you need to do. Can you get a rl friend round, or go to your parents?

Make plans to be away at the weekend and don't answer the phone. Leave him to his ow. You are worth more than this op.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 11/12/2013 17:15

He sounds like a pathetic waste of time to me. Q How do you know when he's lying? A His lips are moving... Hmm

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