Please don't feel you need to respond I just need to get this out.

[Noflamingoshere]

I hate my ex. I hate being around him. I really totally utterly hate his fucking guts and it kills me to have to be around him.

Our child has a hospital appointment today. He got the phone call to say the appointment was happening and sent me a text to say "I will take her"

He has a history, in my opinion, of being controlling and trying to minimise me as a parent. So I replied with "don't I have the right to go to"

And all hell has broken loose.

We share parenting. I know custody isn't the right word but my brain won't find the right one right now. She was there last night but today is my day as it were and I should have responsibility today.

He has told me I have his permission to attend the appointment today.

I don't need his permission. I will be there by hook or by crook.

He has a car and is taking our child. I have to get there by bus. He stood on my door step and yelled at me. He yelled at me on the phone.

It is all me. I am always wrong. Why am I wrong to want to be there for my child? I said I had questions I wanted to ask the doctors and he said I could write them down then he would ask them for me. But I don't know what all the questions are until I hear the doctors.

No. Just sensitive with him.

I have to go to get the bus. Thank you to everyone of you I will be back later

Hope you manage to have a good day op.

Well, I went and I kept my tempter.

He hadn't washed or shaved and his jeans were dirty.

AND he didn't turn his phone off and took phone calls while we were IN WITH THE CONSULTANT

AND when the consultant was asking medical history in the family he talked over the top of me and wouldn't let me speak to the point where the consultant ask me what I wanted to say

AND he got his own family medical history wrong and when I said yes there is X in your family he said "I dont' remember that" in a really sarcy tone

But most importantly she has had tests taken and has to do for more in the next couple of weeks and will be seen agian in a month.

ANd I will be there.

Sending (((hugs)))

He sounds like an absolute arse. And a bully. And, quite frankly, like a really crap father

How are you feeling?

I just looked at him and thought really don't you have a clue what a wanker you look like pacing in the consultants office in your dirty boots with your fucking shitty looking half a beard that just looks dirty on your phone coz you are so fucking important you knob.

But the most important thing is that DD got her tests done and was v brave for all the bloods and the peeing in a pot lol

Urgh, what a bell end

I'm sure the consultant was very impressed

Is there any way to get his telephone number taken off as a "contact" on DD's medical records? It's amazing how often there are administrative cock ups whereby information goes missing.......

I hv a friend in exactly the same position as you , over time he has effectively removed her as a parent , now her child is eight and v mentally screwed up , she regrets not standing up to him now as the damage is done . Her advice and mine is to carry yr shared responsibiltu order thing with you to all appointments and show the hospital etc that she resides with you and you must be called first ( bet he tells everyone to call him first behind yr back) . Read the Lundy book too " why does he do that" you will see him there. Remove as much control as you can and do not engage . Keep yr life private from him . Take control before its too late , my friend ended up in court ( he took her to court all the time for trivia) and because she had never taken charge he portrayed her as neglectful something she regrets to this day, he got more access!!! He now has the child more than her !!!