anxious and stressed

[wontletmesignin]

I think it is all finally sinking in right now!

Im feeling so stressed and anxious lately.
I know i am doing the right thing. I have plenty of support. But it is all too much!

I am sick to death of repeating the same story over and over and over again!
I have put off the freedom programme, simply because i do not want any reminders right now. If and when i feel ready, it will still be available.

I have been to make a statement at solicitors today. My dad is going to do his next week and he really doesnt want to go, which makes me feel like crap.
The SW spoke to 3 of my kids at school today, and i feel like crap for that.

Uhh i just want it to all go away now! Even after christmas - im back in court, twice in january.

I feel selfish for finding it all difficult. I know i need to do it, but it is getting harder and harder. Not easier, like i thought it would.

Sorry you're having a rough time but I'm glad you're having plenty of support. Is there anything you can do short-term to be able to take time to 'recharge the batteries'? It's not selfish at all to find it difficult. It's 100% normal. When things are particularly tough and unlikely to improve quickly you have to pace yourself or you'll burn out. Very important to to take every opportunity to find a little calm and joy in each day to get you through to the next one.

Thank you. Its very hard to recharge. Especially with little one being out of nursery now. I am never free. Had a nice relaxing bath earlier, and felt a little better.

Then i got a note posted through the door saying:

(Random name that i dont know)
Listen plz txt me (my name)
Phone number and kisses

I am now waiting for th police and terrified!
The officer checked the number when i ws on the phone and says it is linked to the name it says on the note.
But who is he??????
I have not long moved here. Only three of my friends know where i live and they are female!!

Every little knock or anything is causing a panic attack.

Why does it say "listen plz ring"
Why not "hi wontletme plz ring me"

Police have been. They are going to check the finger prints, and an officer will knock on all of my neighbours tomorrow to see if they have seen him.

Completely fed up

You poor thing

Oh my god. The police have just come back saying this person has no connection with my ex.
It is the 30 yr old son from next door!!
The police have been and questioned him. He is denying it.
However, he said he had been to the pub with his dad and got back between 9:30-10 which was when it was posted.

His girlfriend was upstairs in bed. Wtf man!
Now i feel like crap that i have had the police to next door!

This is 2 dayd after my other next door neighbour was starting on me.

Am i being tested here or what!

Good God, you don't have much luck !

I suppose getting a cackhanded love note from a pissed neighbour is a bit but could have been worse. I don't expect they knew you were in semi-hiding and that it would cause anxiety big enough to call the police. Is it worth talking to neighbours and asking them to keep an eye out for anyone dodgy?

Nope, seems i have no luck at the minute!

It was werid, but you are right. I havent spoken to any of my neighbours about my ex. I dont know them well enough. So they arent aware of what i am going through.

It is very reassuring though to find that it was just a neighbour, rather than ex having somebody contact me.

The police explained a tiny bit of my situation to the neighbours. The dad says he will pop round this morning. So i will get a chance to explain and ask them to tell me if they ever see him or anyone hanging around my door.

I had no sleep through it all. I think ive just reached a bit of breaking point. But i suppose the only way is up now. I hope!

I'm glad the police explained a little. If 'the Dad' neighbour is a decent bloke and he understands even a small amount of your story then you may actually have a made a friend (even if his note-posting DS is a bit of an embarrassment!). Society being what it is, sometimes you can't beat a bit of a crisis to bring a community together. Good luck

Thank you cogito
Hopefully it does work out like that, and not that they are annoyed at me getting the police.
If i had thought for one second itnwas next door, i would have just ignored it. I guess im just overly cautious at the minute. Im definitely not used to getting peoples numbers.
I feel a bit silly, but giving the circumstances - in sure next door are too.

Hopefully there is no awkwardness

The dad has been. He says his son definitely didnt send it. Even showed his handwriting to the police.
Apparently somebody has created a facebook account under his name. So the question now is...was the person trying to get at me, or him.

Either way, he says if i ever need any help just to bang on the walls or shout and they will be out.
He also told me not to hesitate to knock. So thats good