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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Jealousy

8 replies

Flora5 · 04/12/2013 11:48

I am a little unhappy in my relationship so why am I so jealous over my man? I constantly keep thinking to end it - we have only been together just under two years but he lives in my house (he still has his place). I am very very jealous of his exes - does not help he is still legally married. So. If I am thinking to end it why do I feel like this?? My blood boils every time I think of his last one, they were together 4 years but are still in the same social group and will both be away this week end at the same event. If I want out why do I care? My ex wants me back so what stops me? I would have a far better time if I went back but I just feel paralysed. Comments would be appreciated, thank you.

OP posts:

JeanSeberg · 04/12/2013 11:53

Why has he never got divorced?

onetiredmummy · 04/12/2013 12:02

Do you trust him flora?

Do you think something will happen this weekend between him & ex?

Original poster

Flora5 · 04/12/2013 12:17

No I do not think anything will happen - I totally trust him. It is just that I fell very excluded and she is still a part of a lot of his social stuff.

OP posts:

Original poster

Flora5 · 04/12/2013 12:18

Also, re the divorce - I think even after 10 years he does not want to confront his wife and he sees it as unimportant.

OP posts:

onetiredmummy · 04/12/2013 13:09

Tell him how you feel.

Jealousy & unhappiness do not make for a relationship. It sounds as if you don't want him but you don't want anybody else to have him either, particularly for him to go back to the ex :)

Work out what you want first.

Objectiveman · 04/12/2013 13:39

If you feel threatened by her being part of his social lot - sit down with your partner and explain this.
Jealousy is a strong emotion ( Jeez I Know )
Tell your partner you want to find a compromise where you feel "safe" .
Jealousy is not a rational emotion - it's too hard to control.
He needs to appreciate your position, even if there is no evidence of an attachment to the EX.

FetchezLaVache · 04/12/2013 13:43

What jumped out at me is that you seem to feel that your options are: 1) stay with your DP, who doesn't seem to be making your happy; or 2) go back to your ex, who is presumably your ex for a reason! What about option 3), being on your own for a bit to sort your head out and decide what you want from life/relationships?

aujordoui · 04/12/2013 14:54

Aren't you being hypocritical?

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