Night out with the boys - Lapdancing bars

[BananaMuffinMummy72]

My hubby went out with the boys & has come back with almost no recollection of the evening £550 pounds overdrawn, the money spent in a Lapdancing bar. What goes on in these places that costs £550???

A lot of private dances? They can range from cheapest £50 to probably a lot more depending on the club. So I'm told!!

If he had no recollection I'd say a large portion of the £550 was spent on booze too!!!

Booze is prohibitively expensive (or not as he was spending) - if it was a big group and he bought a couple of rounds that's easily over a hundred quid there. Dancers, private dances it all adds up. Sounds a bit excessive though, is he sure he didn't end up paying for everyone?

It's the huge sum of money that is the issue rather than the thought of what goes on inside? I can think of better things to spend 500 quid on than paying someone to feign interest in me!

He really shouldn't be taking boys to those kinds of places. You should have a word with him.

He sounds like a dick.

Almost no recollection? So he's choosing to pretend he can't remember - nice

You can 'hire' girls to sit with you for, say an hour, plus couple bottles of champagne and that's about £500 in a reputable lapdance club

Almost no recollection? Sounds very convenient. That way, he doesn't actually have to lie about what went on because he can't remember it

Yes, very convenient he can't remember.
All that expensive drink must've given him a fuzzy brain...

Um...

To be accurate, he's £550 overdrawn. So he spent whatever was in the bank account plus the £550 extra.

Too bad he doesn't remember. That's a big investment.

To be fair, you don't sound overly bothered OP.

I'd be so pissed off if my husband went to a lap dancing club! The thought would make my stomach turn! Jesus fucking christ, that's alot of money to blow, i would have been livid! I'm 12 years older than my hubby and feel abit insecure at times so i would hate him to be turned on by all those beautiful young girls. My ex partner used to visit those clubs quite regularly while working in London but strangely it never bothered me. Guess it was never really true love.

Boys? Do you mean friends or co workers?

Spent all the money you had in tbe bank before Christmas plus getting overdrawn and no pay day til end dec? What's he going to do about that?

Will you be removing equivalent amount and buying some crates of cheap champagne with it, to pour down the loo? Don't forget to stick DVD on of the Chippendales whilst you do that.

He does remember, he just isn't going to tell you. Will you put up with it and seethe quietly whilst he and his "boys" laugh about how the " girls" were a bit frosty about it?

How do you know its a lap dancing club, have you seen the receipt? Ring the club up and ask what the money went on.

Yes he does remember. In most clubs, men can buy sexual "extras" from some of the women.

Ringing club pointless and they will laugh at you.
3-4 dances (girls chat to you then strip and bend over - no touching - £150-200.
2 bottles cheap fizz - £150
3 rounds of pints and shots for group of 4-7- £200-250.
You can burn through £500 in 90 minutes with 4 men and 3 girls. More if you tip, they put on fake lesbian show, spending half an hour in private room...

Sexual touching unlikely but that's not much comfort. The object of the game is to get as much cash milked out of the group as fast as possible before they leave. A group dynamic, with men all buying rounds and egging each other on to have at least a dance each can be a thousand quid turned over in a couple of hours. The women pay about £75 a night to work there: they have to work hard and fast to make a profit with dances about £20 and the house getting a cut.

Hopefully he's learned his lesson : he's been picked and squeezed dry like a plum. How you feel about the whole thing is your call: I think it's degrading to everyone but reserve my greatest scorn for those who return.

I don't know where you get the idea that sexual touching is unlikely.

Ex dancers, West End Clubs.
Bouncers chuck anyone out for fingering.
And it slows the [cash-fleecing] process right down: it's not the wank, the finger in the arse, the blow job that makes money. It's the promise and the tease, the 'do you want to watch me and my best friend? Do your friends want to watch too?' and making the punter feel like a witty wealthy someone instead of a walking wallet to be plucked. Actually allowing the touching cuts the cash flow to a trickle. They make more by not allowing the touching and fumbling.

Every woman I have ever spoken to who has done lap dancing, says that some women in most clubs allow some sexual touching. There is usually competition between the women to give dances. And some allow some sexual touching as part of this competition.

Hmm well just going from a friend who kicked her husband out because he paid a lap dancer for sex I would say yeah sexual touching does happen!
I would personally kick my husband out if he even stepped foot in a place like that let alone got us in debt because of it!

A male friend of mine went to one. When hiring a dancer, the men had to sit on their own hands. You are perfectly entitled to rage (I probably would) but instead why not say ''were you asked to sit on your own hands? Why would they ask that? And - did you feel good about being seen as a lecherous, uncontrolled trick?' . Throw back the sordid little ball into his court and let him 'realise' himself what the choice he made was about. If you rage, he'll laugh about it with the lads - as said above. They'll find reassuring safety in numbers as they mutter, with a smile and wink to each other, 'missus was a bit pissed off. No 'how's yer father' for me for a week then'... Let him take responsibility.