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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Confusing behaviour

4 replies

Linny85 · 28/11/2013 00:15

I've had to name change for this because I feel like a silly teen asking about my crush. But it's worth a shot.

There's a bloke that I work with and I've been sensing chemistry between us. He acts like he's interested - he teases me about things all the time, talks to me a lot, once he actually jumped up after he successfully helped me with something (it sounds idiotic and it was, but also cute).

Anyway, his behaviour is completely different at other times. We have different supervisors and when his is around, he doesn't even acknowledge my presence. I don't expect him to come running to me every time I walk into the room. I would at least say hello, or look at him (he doesn't even make eye contact) while I was with my supervisor. In spite of the flirting, he also hasn't asked me out.

I'm confused by this. Have I just misinterpreted his interest? Is he ashamed of being seen with me? Does he think I would act inappropriately with his boss there?

If it helps, he's a few years older than me. I'm not sure of his exact age, but I would say there's a 5-7 year difference. His position is also higher than mine. Even though I'm younger and less qualified, I still work hard and act professionally, so I don't understand what he is thinking.

OP posts:
Linny85 · 28/11/2013 00:15

Sorry for the silly topic, I realise that others are going through much bigger problems than mine.

OP posts:
BillyBanter · 28/11/2013 00:21

Maybe his boss is a bit of a prick who would take the piss out of him if he thought there was the tiniest bit of attraction. Or is harsh if anyone has the nerve not to have their nose to the grindstone every second of the day.

Maybe sometimes he's in a perky mood and other times not.

How is he with other people?

Also is he single?

MadeMan · 28/11/2013 01:05

Sounds as though he likes you, but it doesn't necessarily mean he fancies you or has a crush on you. I tease my sister, my mates, even my boss sometimes if I think I can get away with it and I don't want sexytime with any of them, so it isn't any kind of gauge in my opinion as to interest.

Regarding him being more restrained when supervisors are about, he maybe doesn't want to be the subject of idle gossip, or be seen to be larking about. I wouldn't want people speculating behind my back about who I may or may not fancy in the workplace (even though they probably do; the shit stirring bastards that they are).

CogitoErgoSometimes · 28/11/2013 08:19

Yes you do sound like a silly teen. If you want to go out with the guy, ask him.

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