Am annoyed...WWYD?

[ImABadGirl]

so I arrived back home to find the house trashed and the patio door open, I first thought 'fuck I've been robbed!' Anyway I haven't it's how DP left the house before he went out.

I find him at a relatives house and he doesn't even say hello to me, so I say do you know you left the house insecure?

He denies doing this and doesn't seem bothered, I've tried to speak to him but he's not talking to me.

It's time to get it a miss isn't it?

Advise me oh wise mnetters...

is he a teenager?

Unless this is extremely uncharacteristic behaviour and he's normally wonderful, he does sound like an (irresponsible) arse. You haven't given much info to go on though...

sometimes he is just like a sodding teenager, I think I'm at the end of my tether and have had enough, he works away mon-fri and I've been away with my hobby this weekend, now I have to clean his mess up

I think you know the answer here....
The level of respect he shows for you and your home is glaringly obvious.

To put this into perspective OP. Both DH and I have left the house and done stupid things such as leaving back door unlocked, back gate left wide open. It has happened due to extreme tiredness. Upon discovery, we have both been mortified and very thankful that nothing has been taken etc. This would be the normal response when as an adult you realise that you have messed up but nothing bad has happened. You feel mighty relieved.

As an adult, you do not act in a "yeah and. So what?" manner. Your dp's reaction says one of 2 things. He is very embarrassed and is trying to style it out. Or he really doesn't care. Added to the fact that the home was left in a tip, I strongly suspect your OH is indeed or teenager or worse, you are shacked up with a manchild.

Please tell us this is your home and not his.

He sounds like a bit of waster to me.

a.
a waster.

ExDH once left the door unlocked (and possibly actually open, I can't remember) when we went away for the weekend. However, he was absolutely mortified when we got home and realised what he'd done. Everybody makes mistakes, no harm done etc, but I think I'd have been a bit pissed off if he'd tried to deny it or make out it was no biggie...

I'd definitely give it a miss, was it ever a hit?

why are you clearing the mess up ?

How longstanding a 'P' is he? Is it your house? Do you have kids together? This sounds like a last straw moment to me.

ok we have talked now, he's now saying he didn't realise and is very sorry, I didn't clean up the mess but went out in a huff and when I came home he'd sorted it and put the boy to bed.

Things are normally good but I have a feeling something is not quite right at his work.