Hi, please could I have some rational thinking on my situation. I have been with my partner for 5yrs and he is divorced with 2 kids. I love him very much and his children. I have two kids of my own and am also divorced. The problem is his exwife is such a massive part of our life and my fiance is just not able to set boundaries with her as she is so nasty, spiteful and vindictive . I would love to be able for us to all move on but she refuses to have anything to do with me. I should add I am her exes first relationship after they split up but I was not the cause of it and it was her that instigated the end of their marriage. She was having a relationship with another man at the time of their split but that has now finished. I understand how much my fiance loves his children and of course they should always come first but this is where the boundaries get very blurred. The ex wife will constantly demand attention, for example ringing in the early hrs of the morning drunk and demanding to be collected from a night out, resulting in waking us both and fiance making the trip!More recently I was very upset as one of their kids was admitted to A&E and my fiance made me wait in the car for 2 hrs and not go in as ' he didn't want a scene'. I have never made a scene as it's not fair on the kids and actually I am forbidden to have any right of reply to her. A few wks back he received a text saying that she and their teenage children couldn't move on with their lives whilst he was with me. I don't believe he has any feelings for her but is to scared to stand up to her as she gets very hostile and it's upsets his children. I don't think she wants him back at all but just wants attention, any attention from us. My fiance says he can't move in as he has to put his kids first and make their life less stressful which means keeping her happy. He does love me but I am completely fed up with his weakness and her controlling manipulation. It feels like she is the wife and I am the girlfriend. Am I being unreasonable to insist that he stops rewarding her bad behaviour by helping out with things like taking her car in for a service as this just reinforces her behaviour and she has no reason to change!