I posted in oct about dp possibly cheating, and I got a resounding LTB, I didn't. I've been thinking. If i'd of been younger I would of kicked his arse out and not looked back. Why did I waiver? New job. The kids. Childcare. Scared of doing it on my own, losing the kids home.
It wouldn't be easy but not impossible, nothing's impossible my dad used to say!
I started a new job in sept, shift work so nights, late evenings, early mornings. Starting to wonder about an au pair.... I studied for 3 years to start my career so selfishly don't want to give it up.
The initial rush post his texting another woman and joining a sex dating site has worn off, he's distant again, won't talk. Sex had died down. But I'm still feeling devastated, can't trust him and if I ask to see a text that comes through, it kicks off, he says I'm not trying, that he doesn't look forward to coming home. We can't talk about anything, as he says that's enough and ignores me. Refuses to talk....it's the same as it was before he stepped out, so how long before he goes looking for something else again. Money is tight, bailiffs calling day and night, but he ignores it, never mentions it, basically leaving it to me. I met a friend for coffee, he never asked how it was, I feel he's not interested in me at all. The night shifts I do are killing me, wondering what he's up to all evening. I read and read mumsnet for ideas on how to resolve this, as I've started to imagine me and the kids living a life on our own, being in control of the money, not having to wonder if he'll have any work the next week or if he'll spend money on stuff we don't need. I know he lies, he cheats (possibly) gambles, is inconsiderate of what he's done, expects it to be in the past and never mentioned again, I wondered if life could be more than this. I know I need legal advice as house in joint names, just so scared to give up what I've known as normality for 7 years. Not sure what I'm asking just wanted to say it out loud. Thanks