confused and annoyed at myself

[wontletmesignin]

I want to be by myself for a long time yet. But i keep finding my thoughts drifting to a certain person (not myex).
It is annoying me as i do not want to!

What can i do?
This person has been creeping into my thoughts and dreams for a long time. At least 2 years now.
It was easier to brush off when i was in a relationship.
But now that i am not...its not so easy.

I especially dont want to do anything about it now as im fresh out of a relationship.

I dont even know if i want to do anything about it in the future!

So why oh why does it keep creeping and lingering? Its driving me mad!

It's nice to have a daydream or a fantasy. It's how we know we're alive and not just marking time. If you don't want to act on it, enjoy it.

I agree with that. I just dont understand why the feelings are so strong.

Its as if im pushing myself to do something, when im not actually ready. I hope that makes sense!

Its like smoking. Craving for that smoke, but knowing that you've quit and really shouldn't give in to it.
Thats the best way i can describe it.

You're fresh out of a relationship. However bad it was and no matter why it ended, there was someone there to think about, talk to, etc. 'Nature abhors a vacuum'

Best to ignore these feelings then, as it could very well be my mind latching onto something to think about.
Still doesnt explain the times when i was in the reationship. But i suppose thay could have been due to the fact the relationship was dead, and my mind creatwd an escape route. Is that possible?
Or could the persistence of this thought actually mean something?

Either way, right now is not the time.
I need to focus on gettig my life back on track.

Thank you cogito You talk alot of sense!

Yes to the escape route. When reality is dull, painful or disappointing, it's normal to escape into fantasy. Books, daydreams, films are pretty tame escapes when you consider the alternatives. The persistence of the thought might or might not mean anything. In fact, crushes are often better when they are kept as crushes, simply because it's your narrative. Again... reality can be very disappointing.

Thank you. I have came to the conclusion that i am possibly heading down this route in order to distract myself. With your help :-)

For the next few weeks, at least. I think i should ignore any confusing feeling i get.

If it is still niggling away at me in a months time, then maybe i should look into it more.
But right now, i dont think it would be very wise!

Sounds pretty messed up, but when im reading back over things. I dont think my head is as straight as i thought it was.
Thinking im fine because im not missing him. Forgetting the fact that everything i have been through hasnt been easy, and of course i believe its messed me up a bit.
I just need to accept that now and try and fully focus on getting my head right again.

I hope that makes sense and doesnt make me sound crazy!

You don't sound crazy at all. :) Human beings generally need things like love, companionship, affection, someone/thing to care about. Partners, kids, pets, whatever. We all get lonely. No crime.