Might cause offence, sorry.
Last night, I uploaded a daft video of my 5yo singing the Fox Song. She absolutely loves the song, and i wanted to share it with my friends and family.
She has HFA and speech/language difficulties. So many of the words weren't clear, she was looking at the side instead of at me/the camera, sounded very monotone (except for the ringdingdingdingdingdering part
), was flapping her hands throughout etc.
Anyway, i'm under no false illusions that it was fantastic. It was just a 5yo girl having a sing song.
One of my friends was out at the pub at the time i posted it. She has no kids, nor do the others in my circle of friends, so i doubt this will 'out me'. She commented on it with this (i've fixed the spelling, because it was all text speak which would take me forever to type out):
"Fucking hell. What is this all about? She sounds even more retarded than usual lol (i hate that 'word' almost as much as the R one!). Get this taken down before Facebook remove it for child abuse reasons haha. Check her wee hands out. She's looks like she's going to fly back to Mars any second. Only kidding. But seriously has she been down the pub tonight? She sounds pished! haha!"
I didn't notice the comment for several hours. So it was up there most of the evening. I feel mortified. Lots of other people commented saying she had gone too far etc, but she never replied again. I removed it as soon as i saw it.
Anyway, she phoned me this morning to apologise. She said she was very drunk and it was supposed to be a joke. She said that i should know how much she loves my dd and that i'm seriously over reacting. And DD will be heartbroken if i stop them seeing each other etc.
Basically, i felt like the whole time she was apologising out of duty (not out of guilt) and was making out how much i was over reacting.
We've been good friends since school. We don't get to socialise much nowadays, however, due to me being the only one in the group with a child. But i text her every few days, and call 1-2 times a week for a chat.
I just don't know how to deal with this. I almost feel betrayed. I despise that word. And her whole comment was just vile.
If you were in my shoes, what would you do? She's keeps texting me stupid things like 'Hellllooooo, are you receiving me?' She's fairly immature tbh most of the time, but i think she's still drunk as well.
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Relationships
Would you throw away a 10+ year friendship if your friend called your child the R-word?
EweHaveGoatToBeKiddin · 16/11/2013 09:25
Thank you all so much for these replies. Making me feel much more confident in my decision.
Ex friend has apparently been on the phone to one of our mutual friends, crying hysterically.
Mutual friend called me last night to explain that ex friend is completely sorry and is threatening to harm herself.
Again, so sorry if this makes me sound nasty, but this is complete attention-seeking. She craves attention. She craves drama. She threatens to self harm over the smallest things (even before her mother's death). She uses it as a throwaway term, just like the R word.
I just don't want to be friends with that person anymore. Mutual friend has agreed its up to me, but said she feels like everything is going to change now in our circle of friends. E.g. there will have to be two Christmas lunches/get togethers (a few days before Christmas, we've always done this), one with me and one with her. And this may cause fights because no one can afford both.
I simply said (after a small laugh of disbelief) that things like that aren't enough to make me be friends with her again. And I'd be more than happy to host a Christmas get together for the rest of us at my house - free of charge - a few days before Christmas.
Oh, and she also insisted ex friend does not have a drink problem. She's simply doing what all young, childless women do at a weekend. Go out and get drunk. 
Anyway, onwards and upwards. I've just took (taken?) the initiative to send an email out to my uni class rep suggesting we have Christmas night out after our classes finish up on the 15th. And so far, 10 people have said they're up for it. And thankfully 4 of them are all mid-20s like me so i won't be going out with a bunch of 18yos making a fool of myself.
I definitely do agree that i have to make more of an effort to make new friends. I feel like a new person with all this (small) risk-taking of late.
This reply has been deleted
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Oh, I hope you'll have a lovely time in the lead up to Christmas 
with lots of true friends around you.
She's making all this about herself, isn't she?
I'd try hard not to make mutual friends 'chose sides'; just state that you wish to distance yourself a bit.
Wrt alcohol - alcohol can be harmful well before any kind of full-blown physical addiction. Her alcohol consumption has just cost her a friendship which makes her a problem drinker. And, no, not every child-free, single woman in her 20s drinks regularly to excess...
Onwards and upwards, I am sure you and your DD will have a lovely Christmas x.
wow I my nephew has HFA and what your friend did is so shitty, I don't think I could forgive that. 
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