DP has been seeing someone else.

[ChelseaGirl86]

Hello. If I give you the full story can you give me some advice? Never been in this situation before.
I've been with DP for a year. Very happy - no problems. He has always had low self confidence and has had some flirty message exchanges with girl friends of his. I just put it down to him needing the odd ego stroke and there was nothing really untoward in the messages.
Fast forward to today - a girl has called me from DPs work to say they have been seeing each other since September - no sex but everything else and a couple of dates.
DP has admitted everything and said he was flattered by the attention but then it went too far and he didn't know how to end it in case it caused him trouble at work.

My head says - how can we recover from this? The lies, the infidelity etc
My heart says - our relationship was great, these are his issues and now he has opened up I do believe him.

I'm humiliated, feel like a mug, heartbroken and angry and I just don't know what to do to make myself feel better.

Please help :-(

Exactly what hellsbells said

Everyone deserves loves and respect in their relationships

Well done! Hopefully he'll learn a lesson from this. But I doubt it.

Well done . If you've got a good friend with a bottle of wine and a sofa, now is the time to call them!

Hey, OP.

I think you are very brave to leave the twonk behind. It isn't easy and there will be times when you dreadfully miss him. But you will never have a 'happy ever after' with this man. He is too easily led and to cheat on you with someone he works with? Unbelievable!

You need to stay strong and realise that you really have been given another chance, to find someone who appreciates you. It just was not meant to be.

x

I don't get why the girl called you.

Did she do it with your partners consent?

If it was,get rid of him now,if it wasn't,make him suffer and then get rid of him.

You've done the right thing I'm sure. Cheating on someone you've not even been with for a year? That situation is never going to end well.

And they're always 'contrite'. They're always 'devastated'. They always 'realise' what a mistake they've made. They always realise afterwards how much you 'really' meant to them. Cheaters are ALWAYS such a fucking cliche.

Stay strong. Don't look back.

Well done OP, you've just saved yourself anymore time looking over your shoulder and putting a royal twat first!
You can now concentrate on putting yourself first!

Thanks ladies.
Never thought this guy would be such a cliche.
He's completely not that type. Just goes to show - there isn't a type and you never really know.
Housemate is cooking me dinner and another friend is bringing vodka!

Sadly the only person you can 100% trust is yourself.

Without wishing to sound condescending, you should be really proud of the fact that you are strong enough to boot his sorry ass out of your life

She sounds like a good housemate. Just remember when you're feeling maudlin through drink (vodka in this case) that none of this is your fault.

Yes, you're feeling empowered no and rightly so, but a few snifters can turn a strong person into a sniveling wreck (no offence intended).

no=now

Yes, hand your phone and laptop over at the start of the evening

Good luck and please learn from this, there are men out there who will treat you like a princess so go and find one of them instead.

Thanks ladies. He's been texting all night about how hard this is for him. Resisting the urge to text back some insults but I'm a laydee and will rise above this.

How hard it is for him? Poor diddums! God, the nerve of these men!

Are all men just completely self centred? Even the most generous, kind, thoughtful of the species turn out to be cheating twunts.

No, not all of them. But it does sometimes seem like that when you've just found out that yet another one who seemed lovely is actually a knob.

let me give you a bit of advice, now you have done the right thing, love

next time, don't try to be the cool girlfriend who turns a blind eye to someone taking the piss

That's a no. Lose him.

Mental behaviour. Why would you put yourself through this? Monogamy is difficult enough. It actually sounds like he's saying he went on dates with another woman accidentally. A hero.

You've done the right thing. The first year is the honeymoon period so if he's cheating whilst your relationship is shiny and new how would he be after 2 or 3 years. Thank god your out of it now. Lucky escape.