Advice for my friend

[JackieOHH]

This may be long, but I want to give all the info in order to get the best advice..
My friend is in a relationship with a bloke that is seriously dis functional. She's unhappy but not sure what, if anything, she has as options.
They're not married, no children. They live in a flat/ apartment that's mortgaged and is really in negative equity.
She doesn't love him, but she's always been someone who needs to be in a relationship rather than be alone.
She WAS married, and is still in love with him but he's since married someone else, and that breaks her heart.
She's never had kids, & never will. She earns good money, he doesn't.
She buys him whatever he wants, and quite frankly he takes the piss.
When she & her (ex) husband split up, she left the marital home ( which was HERS, he had no claim to it), she eventually sold that house to her ex, during all this she lived with her friend.
So, the bloke she's with...his good points are-he cooks ( she can't/won't) & is seemingly supportive of her efforts to lose weight, he cleans.
She gets up at 5.45am every day to drive him, the 10 minute drive,to work, he can't drive. She doesn't start work til 8.30...
She pays for almost everything, and he is supposed to pay for the weekly shop, but adds extras ( clothes, DVDs) that she has to pay for.

Monday to Friday they are ok, it's not love story but they 'get on', but she's very much a compromiser & he walks all over her.
Saturday he goes to football, gets very drunk, meets her in town later when he's skint, and becomes abusive.
Last night he poured his drink over her...told her to fuck off, and she'd better not come home.
This was after he'd threatened some random girl who bumped into him & immediately apologised.
He sneers at her, he threatens her, then later on, she will speak to him normally e:g last night she said "where's x gone?" And he said " wtf has it got to do with you, fucking bitch"
I know she has to WANT to end this, but she doesn't want to walk away from her home again & lose everything.. But she doesn't think she can get him out.
Help?? What CAN she do? What rights etc has she got?

She could leave and go down the legal route to force the sale of the property. I don't know whether a court would order that she can buy him out? She needs to see a solicitor.

She needs to talk to a solicitor. It is all going to hinge on whose name is on the deeds and the mortgage. If it's 100% her name and he just pays what is effectively rent, then he has no more rights than a lodger and she can boot his sorry backside... assuming she actually wants to. If he's on the deeds and the mortgage then it's a little trickier, will involve being able to show relative contributions (capital and monthly payments), and she may have to buy him off. I really hope it's the former.

Thanks, Cogito I hoped you'd comment. Sadly this time it's a joint mortgage, highly unlikely she could buy him out, but my priority is how can she get him out NOW?? Seems she can't, obviously as there's no children involved it's more difficult.
He is such a cock, every time we go out he shows up, which in itself I don't mind because they are NOT all over each other, but he is so drunk he completely incohesive, expects her to cough up for everything, then verbally abuses her, not always in that order!
She's stuck...neither can buy the other out, they're in negative equity, and she's very unhappy.

In the first instance all she has to do is insist he leaves and chuck him out. As he's already displaying aggression she'll need support for this part or it could get nasty. You could offer to be the support. She also needs to call the police DV team on 101 explaining that he's already been abusive. Once evicted he can try to regain access legally but that will take time. If he turns up being aggressive she can call the police and have him removed.

I should have said earlier that Womens Aid are really good with advice on how to do this kind of thing properly. 0808 2000 247

Thanks. Looks like, once again, she's taking the easy option. One day she will hopefully get rid & I'm going to be ready & armed with advice.

It's not exactly the easy option. Try not to be too hard on her. Abusive relationships are very complex and very difficult to get out of because, almost by definition, it ends up with the victim's confidence being brought very low indeed. You're a good friend but all you can reasonably do is be ready when she finally has enough.