rubbish day and nagging husband

[smithy100]

I've had rubbish couple if day 3 yr old dd I'll with a cold but had loads of toilet accidents I've been cleaning poo all day. I'm on school trip tomorrow but dh now can't look after her so got a friend too he has know about the trip for weeks. He is late home from work (he is late all the time). I just know when he get back our evening will go like this ..I'll make dinner (he won't look up from computer) we won't agree on anything to watch on TV so I'll go to bed early again. The house is tidy and I feel really under valued. Its a rant but unhappy!

So, serve dinner up at the table and prompt him to acknowledge and thank you for it.
Doesn't solve the rest of the problems but that's a start.

Don't want to read and disappear ... sound like you're having a blooody rought time. Other far wiser MNetters here shortly to reply. Meanwhile, hang in there ... and tell DH to bloody well INTERACT with the family. Could he not help put the kids to bed, at the very least?

Is he nagging you or are you nagging him? I didn't really get that from your OP. Also, was your dh supposed to be looking after your dd tomorrow.

I'm a bit confused as to what the problem actually is. If he is late just tell him he missed dinner and will have to sort himself out.

The main problem Is I feel very under valued. My husband makes me feel that what I do really isn't that hard and I'm dissapointed that he has got out of looking after did tomorrow. When he gets home he always asks if kids have done homework I've been doing it for 2 nights with them. Always makes me feel like I'm not doing my job properly.feel like he wants a 1950s housewife but who works as well.

Did you both agree that he would look after her initially? I can't really see how that is a problem unless he changed his plans at the last minute, in which case it would be up to him to arrange alternative childcare.

How many children do you have and what ages are they. What hours do you work? I'm struggling to get a picture of what it is you want him to do, without a bit more information.

You haven't got a husband, you've got a millstone around your neck. I'm a lone parent and, whilst it's not a walk in the park, at least I don't have to navigate some selfish arse of a man telling me I'm rubbish as well as managing the rest of my life. Stand up to him, demand some respect, don't tolerate being treated like you don't matter.... and if he doesn't shape up, he can take a hike.