What's the chances of attacks could start again?

[CCTVmum]

Some of you know me from old. So wont go into to much depth but need advice on this!

(HH you will be pleased to hear I have my house up for sale! YAY!)

Do I take CCTV down now as I think people will be put off seeing CCTV.

So my question is

If I take CCTV down what is the chances of ex attacking my home again?

CCTV been up over 2 years now, although no attacks he has driven past and parked outside but only 2 occasions I know about (as seen him) in last 12 months (so has become more infrequent I think).

Could his behaviour been dampened/other distractions now?
Has he learnt to stop this behaviour?
Or does a leopard never change their spots?

Should I take CCTV down?

Have a word with the solicitor regarding disclosure to the buyers. This seems the simplest approach. Since a) the harassment has been specifically aimed at you and b) it has become less over time, it doesn't sound as if there is any risk to the purchasers; but proper legal advice is probably best.

Please don't do anything to jeopardise your safety or 'draw fire' in any way. So I would suggest not to put up a sign or write to his mum, or anything similar. My best suggestion here is to talk to women's aid or any DV experts you're in contact with - police, perhaps - to obtain some advice on what precautions you should take while you move.

Don't panic about a gap in a hedge that existed two years ago, it'll be quite different now, hedges are living things. Have a quick survey if it makes you feel easier, but don't set too much importance on gaps, especially at this time of year.

I think you're probably going to be fine if he was properly stalking you rather than randomly attacking your home (that sounds massively wrong, but you know what I mean). I don't think you need to be too worried about slandering the bastard, but maybe, instead of sending his mum pics, you get your conveyancing solicitor to send a letter saying that you are no longer at that address and will not be providing a forwarding address (I'm assuming that there is no grandma relationship going on there). That should give him the heads up that you're no longer there and he can leave well alone.

Can I just say that I think you are incredibly brave; even the little bits that you have posted on here make me think that you are incredibly strong. I hope that you and your son have a brilliant life in your new home.

wordB leaving CCTV will be enough and ex will quickly realise I am not their I am 100% confident in that!

I have to be careful and liase with my legal team (MN) as they have not let me down and been spot on all the way through this.

On last stretch and need to get it right WordyB and yes not ignite any further anger....as it doesnt take much if any at all just breathing seems to be a trigger tbh

Got time to plan name changing and good to get brain storming here on issues around safety of future occupants too as well as ds and mine.

OLKN Neighbour at end of street has shaped the hedges so larger gaps tbh so better for me to see a car parked their. Their are bus stops around corner too so hanging around is easy for ex too as looks like waiting for a bus.

TReater yes I understand! It is a safe stalking cant believe I just said that!

I wasnt always brave though had some horrendous times here bit like The Shining tbh! Nearly lost my marbles and 3 weeks before I was told we could have CCTV I accepted he was going to murder us and just leave the front door open to put me out of my misery...as frint door was falling out of the wall at this point and ex was using screwdrivers to force the locks whilst ds and I slept. He knew when I slept too? I would go 12 nights without sleep and catch 2 hrsin day. On 13th night I would be in a coma nearly as so exhausted and he would attack then. Weird that!

Wowsers. Please do not alert his family and slip away as quietly as you can...and I would name change in real life if at all possible. What a nightmare. Well done on surviving.

To the buyers you can mention that you put the CCTV to prevent your ex from attacking you but that he seems to have given up as nothing has happened in quite a while.

Do check the exact words with your conveyancer.

You've had good advice. I'm sure it will work out.

And thanks :) all fine.

FF think your right disappearing would be better to slip away.

I guess if everyone told whole truth no one would buy other places. I know new occupants would be safe as ex would make sure I was their and alone so he would work that out fast. He wants to get at me only, hence need to really think about the whole disappearing now I have the chance.

Don't know where I start sounds a lot!

Plus I am hoping ex doesnt bother anymore so problem solved!

Delighted to hear all fine Lweji!

Well I know I was worried CCTV would stop house selling!

OMG last night or at least this am heating never came on and my Boiler is broke! I am devastated!

Am I cursed or what??? I know I can't sell without boiler/heating/hot water agh!!!!

Wouldn't be surprised if the evil Satan loving twerp did something of bad vibes to cause it being his equiv of Xmas day! (well I know not really but wouldn't put it past the sicko to try).

Was so happy on Monday too I got this far!!! Why now?

You can sell, but it will have to be a bit cheaper.
Have you checked prices for repairs?

Hang in there. Don't let it discourage you. It's not the end of the world.

It happened to me the other day and it was fixed the next day.

Or do you think you need a new boiler?

If the boiler isn't too elderly, it may be fixable fairly cheaply. I understand why you think your ex had something to do with it, but I'm absolutely certain it's nothing more than a nasty coincidence. Keep strong.

Phoned company and their hourly rate Lweji

I am going to try see if I can get grant tomorrow but I think I am about 5p over the limit! HA!

I know OLKN but odd day and just so happy Monday it going up and then today??? That flaming rollercoaster !!!

It feels like House of Horror series now where it is doing everything it can to stop me leaving ( but thats just because of the day it happened ).

Garlic you around hun? To check if the twerp did any weird stuff on his blog thingy?

Of all the days it just reinforces twerps whole ethos and twisted mind. Hope others understand Gaslighting? (It's when ex would do things to make me look/sound mad)!

If Garlic's not around, PM me his blog and I'll have a look. Will check the other stuff.

Nowt on his soundcloud. Looks like he's deleted everything.

will do thanks OLKN! I know deep down this is coincidence. But it has taken me so long to get this far small setbacks hit hard! Living here a minute longer than I have to is very very hard! I'm ready to go tomorrow!

Oh that's a nuisance, CCTV. Something similar happened to us - a major repair needed just as the property went on the market. It had to be fixed, but became a kind of selling point - brand new xx, just fitted, type of thing.
Hope you qualify for a grant (fingers crossed for you )

Wordy has a point, "brand new boiler" could be a selling-point. But it's also going to be about £3k from what I've seen, and that's going to be hard to find. Do you have any sort of insurance that might cover it?

Thanks WordyB, yes your right if grant goes through yes it would be great selling point!

OKLN thanks for that!

Hello lovely, I thought it might be you. I'm so glad you're selling :)

I agree with the advice given upthread. Hang in there, you're doing great.

Sunshine now and ongoing support. I am hanging in their but only one week in and I am nervous, worried if cant sell ( CCTV) then this huge problem with boiler.. not a full week yet! Hope it goes fast! Now I am ready to go I want to be gone!
Don't know what else will go wrong? Just worried I guess normal, in an abnormal situation!

Hello. Massive news you're going to move - yay! Leave CCTV up and don't worry about it. No point in compromising your safety.