How common/rare is this?

[neiljames77]

The girl I went out with before I got married was exceptionally violent. I don't mean in everyday life because she was lovely then. I mean during sex. She became a different person and was horrible. I never encountered anything like this before or since. She always apologised afterwards and got upset.

She might have only behaved like that with you.

She might purr like a pussy cat with him.

What Cogito says.

There was never any serious injury and she was lovely when she wasn't in the "zone". I just asked her to tone things down a bit.

What kind of injuries are we talking about? Quite a lot of abusive people are lovely when they're not throwing punches

Perhaps you could say something vague like "she's lovely but I think she has ishoos"?

Nail marks that broke the skin, pinching and twisting skin, bite marks, spitting in my face, pulling my hair and swearing during sex. Like I said, unless he's into some pretty weird stuff, he isn't going to like it if he gets with her.

I've heard of it, a friend told of a woman. Apparently this woman would regularly come in to work with bruises and all sorts of wounds. It sounded like DV when I was first told, but apparently just very violent sex; she was almost hospitalised as a result of one occasion, which was when my friend came across her (HCP).

Perhaps she was your ex? South London?

No. I'm in the north. It must just be very rare.

Rare.

Pretty rare, I should think. If you are worried about him, perhaps you could give a subtle hint. She might have changed since you shagged her, though.

If it was man doing this type of stuff to a woman, we'd tell her to call the police. I think it's unsafe to assume this is just some kind of sexual kink. Did you tell her at the time that this was the reason for breaking up? Does she see think she has a problem?

In OP it says 'girl' - so we don't actually know if there was a woman over age of consent involved at all.

Please would you clarify if you mean female child, who might well fight in these circumstances.

We were in our early 20's so she was over the age of consent. It's just a term as in "girlfriend".
It is a bit different between the sexes because I could have got up and walked away whenever I wanted, whereas a woman in the same situation might find it more difficult, so there's no hypocrisy.
I took the cowards way out when I decided things were a bit too weird and just didn't answer my door or the phone.