Need to vent !! I'm sick to death of my ex always making me feel that wrong and never getting support from family/ friends and whatever I do is wrong, my ex left me and our two kids 3+8 last year after I discovered he was cheating, so in the last year I have tried everything to make things simple he has switched between me and the ow many times and never settled anywhere during this I have tried to be understanding, considerate that he finds it hard to leave his kids and tried to maintain a friendship for kids sake ( then I get called desperate a doormats and to soft ) if I ask him to stay away I get called a manipulative control freak and useing kids as pawns... Now my ex lives with his mum and cannot have our girls there he also still stays at ow house as she just had his baby now 2 mths old and he feels he can pick and choose where he stays as it's for his children!!! And feels there is nothing wrong with staying at hers or mine I have allowed this as the only way he can have access to children is to be at mine... Then he gets comfortable and takes advantage of me letting him visit if I call him on this he runs back to his mums to avoid te confrontation and refuses to just pick and drop kids of with me as he has no where to go/ do with them I don't see how this is my problem and I feel he should of thought about that before he cheated, he has been saying for months he can't live with ow as it's not what he wants so won't do it which as hard as that would be for me the option of regular routine acess and ability to provide a home for the kids out ways the hurt I would feel he refuses to live or rent somewhere as he can't afford it!!! Even tho I have found acomadtion within his budget as that's not what he wants, he admits he still can't break from me and live without me( don't believe it) but can't live with what he has done and come back to me (not sure I would ever want him) we ended up in a huge row which turned nasty so I have stopped access for a short time while the air clears as I know it's not healthy for our kids !! But now he is playing the victim and making out I'm the bad person and not accepting his part in creating all the problems and doing nothing to make things better he sees nothing wrong with having me and ow as best friends and thinks having family days out both ways is perfectly acceptable, I really don't know what to say or do all I know is the way we have been existing can't continue but don't like being made to feel a bitch in it all over the last year the stress has caused many health problems for me both physically and mentally and I know I can't bear much more so I'm being strong and trying to do what I feel is right for our kids and me but I'm being told I'm being selfish stopping him seeing his kids that he loves ( his choice to cheat and leave them what the hell was he thinking would happen) he wants to be a good dad but I feel he can't offer them much other than a couple of hours here and there and only if he is in my house !!! Am I wrong ???? All I want is a chance to re-build my life for him to have access to kids and give me time to myself to move on !!!