It isn't always the case that the mother is disadvantaged financially during the marriage either. Dh and exw were together 5 years. Dh worked, paid the mortgage, all of the bills, childcare etc. Exw never worked and went to university for 4 years. Dh's shift finished at midday, but Exw stayed at university/with friends until after dss bedtime, so dh was the main carer. Dh paid for a childminder in the mornings.
When they divorced, the house was sold and everything divided. Exw student debts were paid off, as was her car, and she was given 60% of what remained, and the contents of the house, because she 'had to support dss'. She walked into a professional well paid role on the back of her degree. With no debts and loads of cash in the bank (for her wedding to om). OM had a house, so no worries there.
DH bought a dilapidated house in a bad area with the small portion he received. His job was poorly paid, it had been enough before, but now the house prices had shot up and he was struggling with the larger mortgage. He had to do all of the pick ups/drop/offs - she was much too busy with her important better paid job. He ended up looking after dss more than she did, but she would never admit it. He felt trapped in his dead end job having to work within school hours. She was earning twice as much as him, her oh was earning 3/4 times as much, so dss was left with an affluent family on one side and a poor family on the other. Once we didn't have heating/hot water for 5 months because we couldn't afford to fix the boiler, dss cost us as much/more (because of travel) as he cost exw for necessities, but dh has always been expected to pay exw csa. When he stopped he was vilified. People always give a vague reason, like 'he's supposed to support his child!'. How is he not supporting his child? I would absolutely love to know precisely what people think he should be paying for.
Sorry for hijacking your thread op!