He lies all the time, whenever he thinks there might be any form of confrontation he lies to avoid it. He'll agree to things to my face and just do whatever behind my back.
There's a back story of losing thousands of pounds gambling, which is on here somewhere, but he also lies about things that aren't really all that important or things that he's said he'll do that I don't mind about at all.
As far as the gambling goes, he felt it was an addiction and we decided to treat it as an illness. I said at the time that I was happy to support him but he couldn't lie to me about it.
I've caught him out in lies about minor (in comparison to losing all that money any way) lies a few times. We've discussed how important trust is to our relationship and he always agrees. The last time I caught him I gave him the chance to come clean about anything else that was going on and told him if he lied to me again like that it would be the end of our marriage. I'm also well aware that the lies I've caught him out in are unlikely to be the only lies he's told me.
Last night I was closing down the computer and noticed an icon for a gambling site. I asked him what it was and he lied. He was sitting next to me, looking at the evidence on the screen with me and he lied about what it was and what he was doing with it.
I felt totally backed into a corner and asked him to leave. He's coming back tonight to explain it to our 3 year old DS and to work out contact.
This is a pattern with him. There will be a big blow out about something, he'll make a big announcement about not doing it, usually at his own instigation and then leave very obvious signs that he's still doing that thing. Its like he wants me to find out and when I do find out he tells me bald faced lies that can't possibly be true. He then has a moment of confession, like the end of a magic trick and swears he'll never lie again and then we go back to the start.
I don't want to end our marriage and break up my family but I can't see what else to do.