big dilemma

[noNicknameAnymore]

I have a very serious problem
and absolutely no idea what to do

I was trying to find some friends
I was considering some Internet dating but actually changed my mind due to dilemma that it is not responsible thing to do
I don't even know what to do with rest of my life
I don't want to go in to details because when I
was trying to talk about it some people laugh at my situation and made a total fun of me
Which was heartbreaking because just imagine you would laugh at the person who for example lost right hand

I hope you find some friends. If you don't like internet dating - and it's not 'irresponsible' but there are plenty of pitfalls - then the old-fashioned way is to get involved in your community, join in with activities and meet new people who share your interests. It's not acceptable for anyone to make fun of you so I hope you stood up for yourself. Good luck

From another point of view it is extremelythingsand very
ironic so I should also start laughing at my situation

Like someone have noticed a long while ago just
Unlucky

I was hoping to get some more ideas when I talk with the latest therapist but it was more like a monologue

Anyway recently Im just putting all those doubts on the back of my head but not knowing what the future holds
is slightly upsetting

its been almost 6 months since a lots of thinghappen

Posted to fast
Extremely ironic so I should. ...
Well perhaps I should

No-one knows what the future holds. That's just the way life is. Anything can change at any time. We all have to take things as we find them and try to make the best of it.

I'm sorry things ate difficult for you OP

I would counsel against online dating if one is even slightly out of sorts. It can be an extremely rough ride

Cogito there is no more "to make the best of it"
nobody can even imagine worst scenario from this what happened in my life
And all those people who are responsible should just f*k celebrate
But of course I do know I have to face consequences of my life and it's really scares me
I was normal and happy and well once

Obviously nobody knows what the future holds but when you don't even know what is going on in your life
End even if you trying to fight it what's the point of that

I think Internet dating is currently not something you need. I think you sound too vulnerable and it could make you feel worse about yourself.

You mention therapists - are you currently seeing one and is it going ok? Have you spoken to a Dr ?

and that face of my ex
so victorious and so sneer every time I have to see him

Well I learnt how to be a looser I don't have problems with this but it makes me sad

Kali like I said I changed my mind about it
Is not really fair on anybody

It's very difficult to know what to say to you as the information you're putting forward is rather confused. No-one can imagine this worse scenario you mention unless you're a bit clearer about what that means. This 'victorious' ex, for example, does that mean you've suffered violence? You sound very despairing if you think there is no future and that all you can do is face consequences.