I don't know where to start really.....

[skyblue11]

So today I can't stop crying, I'm really emotional I suppose I am afraid of the future and feel I have little to look forward to.
Where do I start? I'm in a marriage which is well.....not good without going into further detail. I have a DD who is about to go to Uni.....My mum has memory problems so I'm supporting her.....my brother is disabled I am his appointee etc so have ongoing support for him....I'm hypothyroid and knackered most of the time.....I have a stressful job that I hate.....
I feel I can't talk to anyone because all these problems are my own making. For example I got offered a fab job recently and turned it down because of caring for my Mum.
I feel like my life will be over when my DD leaves, I have put all my energy and time into her so I already feel bereft, she is the only good thing in my life that has kept me going.
I am resent my DH as he is the reason she wants to leave. The thought of just me and him is one I can't think about.
I feel pressured about my Mum as Dad died of Dementia 2 years ago and I'm still raw from that without coping with her diagnosis, I am so worried about her, and of course my brother is always in the background I call him my second child I didn't ask for.
I just wanted to let off steam, sorry if I come over as self pitying.

It's not self-pitying. Everyone is entitled to stick a hand in the air and shout 'help!' You sound like a kind, caring person, you have a lot on your plate and you must be emotionally exhausted. Having a 'not good' marriage which I take to mean an argumentative/miserable/unsupportive DH is just another source of stress that you don't need.

Have you thought about talking to your GP in the first instance? You may benefit from some personal counselling or even short-term medication to enable you to work out what to do for the best.

So sorry to hear about your situation.
I've been/ still am coping with similar problems.
Is there one good thing you could do for yourself on a daily basis? Some real "me time"? No need to feel guilty for taking time to recharge your batteries.
Have just finished reading the 5 languages of love, a book designed to help you figure out how to best fill your "tank" so that you find giving to others, not just your partner, easier. There's a good online test too.
Sorry, this is just a band-aid...

My GP would just put me on anti-depresants and I don't want that I was on some 10 years ago and had a bad time coming off them, I'm just emotional today, tomorrow I will pick myself up again, every so often I get a bit down
I had CBT when Dad died it didn't help really, I'm just tired I suppose and very emotional today slightest thing set me off and now i cant stop!

Mues that sounds good I will research, I may go offline in a short while as DH is due back and he always check what I'm up to...

Could you plan to leave home when your daughter leaves? I assume she'll be going next summer? It would give you something to look forward to and plan for. No wonder you feel like you're struggling - anyone would be in that situation.

What's the problem with your marriage?

Sky - You're in the right place for support.

I have only part of your problem in that my DF has dementia, and my Mum is struggling to support him. They're also trying to sell their house and downsize. DS, 15, has ongoing health problems.

All I can say is this - keep coming back to talk or to rant at us. Some of the problems you have are solvable in different ways. You just need to break them down into chunks, and deal with them one by one.

1). Consider leaving the marriage
2). Consider moving closer to DD (as a result of point 1.)
3). Check that your Mums GP is aware of what you're doing for her, and ask if there is any help out there to support you (or her).
4) Ditto for your brother.

Get a few - or all of those in motion. There's another job out there for you. Fate is strange thing.

PS I totally get your aversion to ADs. Awful things for me, too! Not sure if Rescue Remedy would help...?

Your DH checks your internet usage?