Cheating what would be a deal breaker for you?

[Tweetypie27]

Having been cheated on in the past my ex had emotional affairs and cyber sexing with women he knew. I ended marriage because of this I've been told by others as it wasn't sexual contact I should have forgiven what would you forgive ?

Ah ladies you have made me smile that I have actually spoken to people with morals :)

Ender for me it was the lying and when he got caught he continued to lie and then very now and then he would drip feed a little more and then a little more.
I even checked Facebook on the dates he was doing all this and I was writing what a great husband he was and that I loved him and at night he was messaging these women whilst I was asleep in bed.
I remember last year my son cut his hand right open it was the time he was threatening to leave me and I rang him said I was taking out son to hospital and be barely cared about it.
Yesterday my son bought a photo home from school where the teacher had taken a picture of the bandage on his hand and it bought it all back again that he was messaging a woman at work at that time and bein her shoulder to cry on because her boyfriend had hit her while I was sat at home pregnant with two kids to look after and that photo just made me realise there's so many times I would remember a memory would bring it all back like yesterday and I know i could never forgive him .

what a weasel! he might be asking family and friends to say such things to you on his behalf. complete honesty with said family and friends about the extent of his seedy deceit should help them understand your choice!

I seriously doubt the GP 'wanted him sectioned'. Psychiatrists section people if they are a serious risk to themselves or others, there is a long line of professionals to go through and 2 signatures are required. GPs are involved of course but it's a bit more complicated than that!

It is very resource inefficient to section someone and MH services will keep someone at home unless it's absolutely necessary. Sounds like emotionally manipulative bollocks to me, stay strong you're doing brilliantly.

You have not broken up the family - he has.

You have done exactly the right thing.

I don't know who these muppets are that are telling you that you should forgive him & it's all your fault but the disposable ones need disposing of and family need to be told that if they want to maintain a relationship with you they just need to not mention it again or you'll be forced to bury them under the patio I can't believe that anyone who loves you would tell you that you should be with this twat... it is a credit to you that you know better!

Thanks ladies God knows when I've told friends sometimes they act like he's just looked in a another woman's direction and that it. Are peoples morals that low that I should stay with him to keep the boys happy I would rather my boys see theirs consequences to every action in life and I didn't stand for their dad disrespecting me or them and took the right route for me and us as a family.

Lies, deceit and the absence of respect are deal breakers for me. That rules out all actions involved in any level of cheating. My dh and I have had one serious this may be a break up situation, all it involved was his lying to me and intentionally deceiving me about his smoking. I met him as a smoker, I hate it, but I can live with it. I could not live with his pretending to quit and hiding it from me. I lost a huge amount of respect for him that he could lie to my face, (which he did when I told him I knew) I also felt that he had lost respect for me in that he felt that he could deceive me 'to prevent from hurting me.'
I still struggle with the fact that he was so ready and comfortable lying to me. It upsets me even now years later. All the other ups and downs are par for the course. Trust is necessary, respect is essential. Sounds like you are well rid, and that your friends have low standards, and perhaps very little respect for themselves. He obviously does not respect you. At least you can say you respect yourself after all of this. If you had stayed would that still be the case?- thought not.

Definitely :)

Do they know everything you wrote here?

If they did, it sounds like you need new friends and to either educate your family or tell them to STFU - I simply can't believe your family would know all of that and still think you should take him back - beggars belief. Thankfully you sound far to sensible to 'go there' again! Definitely a good role model for your boys :)

I had a mate once who thought it was dreadful that I binned a boyfriend who stood me up in order to stay in the pub with his mates.
To me, it said far more about her lack of self respect than my actions. Her romantic life was and still is a disaster.
Never underestimate the willingness of some women to tolerate all kinds of crap in order to keep a man. It's sad but not your problem.

Thankyou ladies feel better now had a wobble today my son misses his dad keeps crying for him today.
God I hate the bastard for doing this to my kids!

I told ex today after another begging session i would rather pour vinegar into an open wound than be with him again! It's hard at times I still love him in a way but guess I love myself more now.

Cheers for the replies