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Original poster

Would this P**s you off?

26 replies

Radley · 01/07/2006 15:24

I've recently lost alot of weight, and, this morning i was rushing to get ready and threw on a pair of pre-weightloss jeans, but, they are now wayyyyyyyyy to big.

I went to meet him in the pub and after a glass of water, got up to leave and said that these jeans were no good and they would have to go, to which he replied

"No they don't save em for when you put your weight back on"

I told him that I would no keep them as I wouldn't be putting the weight back on, he then said

"Ok, get rid and when you put your weight back on and cant get into them again you're not buying anymore'

I told him to piss off at this comment [blunt] and walked to the door, i heard him start saying something to the barmaid and he didn't see me standing there, he said

"I've got 200.00 in my wallet, i might as well give it to her to throw away"

I just said "what about you wasting all your money at the bookies every day" to which he told me to "F**k off, this was in front of the bar staff and another customer who was in.

I said piss off again and walked out. I am soooooooooooooooooo angry now I am shaking.

All this stems from the fact that i am losing weight and now have my nails done every 3 weeks and have my hair done every six week and he is complaining about the cost, but, he goes to the bookies EVERY day, i used to drink 2 bottles of wine a night and now I drink a bottle once a week, if that, so in my eyes, the money i used to spend on beer i now spend on making myself feel better about myself.

He is now out with the lads watching the football, he had had 4 pints when I left him, so i've no idea what state he will be in when he comes home, he has no key either.

Who is in the wrong here? what would you do?

OP posts:
Original poster
Radley · 01/07/2006 15:24

I've recently lost alot of weight, and, this morning i was rushing to get ready and threw on a pair of pre-weightloss jeans, but, they are now wayyyyyyyyy to big.

I went to meet him in the pub and after a glass of water, got up to leave and said that these jeans were no good and they would have to go, to which he replied

"No they don't save em for when you put your weight back on"

I told him that I would no keep them as I wouldn't be putting the weight back on, he then said

"Ok, get rid and when you put your weight back on and cant get into them again you're not buying anymore'

I told him to piss off at this comment [blunt] and walked to the door, i heard him start saying something to the barmaid and he didn't see me standing there, he said

"I've got 200.00 in my wallet, i might as well give it to her to throw away"

I just said "what about you wasting all your money at the bookies every day" to which he told me to "F**k off, this was in front of the bar staff and another customer who was in.

I said piss off again and walked out. I am soooooooooooooooooo angry now I am shaking.

All this stems from the fact that i am losing weight and now have my nails done every 3 weeks and have my hair done every six week and he is complaining about the cost, but, he goes to the bookies EVERY day, i used to drink 2 bottles of wine a night and now I drink a bottle once a week, if that, so in my eyes, the money i used to spend on beer i now spend on making myself feel better about myself.

He is now out with the lads watching the football, he had had 4 pints when I left him, so i've no idea what state he will be in when he comes home, he has no key either.

Who is in the wrong here? what would you do?

OP posts:
DevilsAdvocado · 01/07/2006 15:28

He is in the wrong. He has zero respect for you. Tell him to shape up. And I'm sure all that beer isn't doing his waistline any good either! Are you spending a lot of money? Perhaps money is tight at the minute and he is just being cautious?

well done you for losing weight though, I think he might feel a wee bit insecure now that you are slimmer?

Original poster
Radley · 01/07/2006 15:30

My nails cost 15.00 every 3 week hair 35 every 6 weeks, he on the other hands goes out probably once a week (twice this week) and goes to the bookies every day, even on holiday, he is going to the races next week and I dread to think how much he spends there.

OP posts:
fuzzywuzzy · 01/07/2006 15:31

He can't be that worried about money if he's going to the bookies everyday.

Do you think he might feel a bit insevure about you having lost loads of weight and loooking fabulous whilst he still looks the same???

Well done on the weight loss.

Mytwopenceworth · 01/07/2006 15:32

sounds to me like he is scared. he is trying to sabotage you. i would bet money (had i any!) that he is worried you will become so totally hot you will wonder what you are doing with an uglybug like him!

Original poster
Radley · 01/07/2006 15:33

I honestly don't know, but he doesn't seem to support me as much and complains if I say i'm having nails done etc

OP posts:
Original poster
Radley · 01/07/2006 15:34

He is overweight yes, but he is happy with himself, or so he tells me. he is about 17st

OP posts:
mancmum · 01/07/2006 15:44

so he gambles everyday, insults you in front of people and is totally unsupportive of your weight loss... mmm dream boat!! Sorry to be harsh but he is not exactly partner of the year material here is he.... so no way are you in the wrong... I personally would be no where near a man like that... especially the gambling... going to the bookies every day, even on holiday -- if that is not an addiction, tell me what is...

of course it could all be down to his insecurity, but why do people have to act like to**ers when they feel threatened... you have worked hard to lose weight and maintain it... he should be basking in your achievements and I would be asking him some very tough questions about how he sees your relationship...

Original poster
Radley · 01/07/2006 15:50

His mum told me before she died that when he was younger he had a gambling problem, but she gave him an ultimatum.

Even the kids get fed up of him putting the horse racing or poker on the television.

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 01/07/2006 16:56

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AttilaTheMeerkat · 01/07/2006 16:58

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Original poster
Radley · 01/07/2006 20:27

I've just text him to tell him i am going to bed and he has turned his phone off, he has no key, i am so

OP posts:
Tinker · 01/07/2006 20:35

How long have you been with him? Why are you with him?

Original poster
Radley · 01/07/2006 20:35

together 8 years, married 9

OP posts:
Tinker · 01/07/2006 20:36

Eh? Other way round surely?? WHy with him? Have to go now so am not ignoring any further posts.

expatinscotland · 01/07/2006 20:36

have to agree w/mancmum on this.

Original poster
Radley · 01/07/2006 20:41

lol, yes, married 8 years together for 9 lol.

OP posts:
LoveMyGirls · 01/07/2006 20:55

i would drop him he sounds like a loser. if he didnt spend all the money on gambling you could have nice holiday/ clothes/ stuff for the kids/ nicer home etc etc

how often does he win more than he loses?

mancmum · 01/07/2006 21:09

I have just come back to this it has been on my mind all day... you used to drink 2 bottles of wine a night... so there must have been a deep level of unhappiness in you to need to do that.. now you are showing how strong you are by doing the weight thing and taking pride in your appearance without any support from your H... reading your other posts, there seems to be no +ve statements about H....even your kids are pissed off with him...

I would not give up without a fight as there are kids involved... get to relate -- on your own if need be and look at what you want... what are you getting from this relationship? Are you happy?

Thinking of you...

JellyNump · 02/07/2006 00:02

Yes, I would be well p*ssed off!!! I think its very unfair that can't he be supportive of you, they're your jeans and if you want to get rid of them, get rid of them!!! Are they a designer pair of jeans? I'd be annoyed if dh went to the bookies everyday!!!

Original poster
Radley · 02/07/2006 09:20

Are they heck designer, i can't get into designer stuff yet :d they cost me about 20.00.

He finally made it home about 9.30pm, i could hear him falling about etc but didn't come down,

He

A) Made some chips whilst rat arsed
B) Left the back door wide open

He is now laid in bed watching sky and i doubt i'll see him before midday

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 02/07/2006 11:32

"He

A) Made some chips whilst rat arsed
B) Left the back door wide open

He is now laid in bed watching sky and i doubt i'll see him before midday"

Radley,

Well why don't you tell him to drag his sorry behind out of bed before midday?. If you are not part of the solution then you are part of the problem.

If he used the chip pan or deep fat fryer whilst drunk he put you all at risk, he could have easily forgotten about the chips. Leaving the back door wide open is a security risk - an open invitation to burglers.

I see you have not answered the question put as to why you are with him. You probably cannot answer why you are with him.

sparklemagic · 02/07/2006 12:17

throw away the damn deep fat fryer! They are a well knows cause of house fires particularly if people are stupid enough to use them while drunk.

Won't do his or your waistline any good either - no point havingit in the house!

Blondilocks · 02/07/2006 12:22

He is in the wrong.

It seems to me that he thinks it's ok to throw money away on gambling, but not on things that are useful to you, which is unfair.

Just a thought - if the pre-weightloss clothes are in a reasonable condition why not ebay them and then use the money for more treats for you!

Original poster
Radley · 02/07/2006 12:58

blondilocks, that is what i'm going to do as larger clothes seem to go quite well.

He has nipped out to taked dvd's back, but i bet he goes to the pub, he's taken a key and not taken his mobile.

OP posts:
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