Hold my hand and tell me to stay strong!

[ShakeItOut]

Please. Anyone who has been through their DH having an emotional affair. I told him I had enough, I couldn't trust him and told him to leave a week ago. This on top of other problems I thought we had sorted through with lots of councelling and hard work. Things were the most stable they had been in years, then I found out about the EA from a year ago and two online flirting sessions since then. Swears up and down nothing more happened. His family are totally behind me in whatever I want to do but they suspect there was nothing more going on.
Now I'm so wobbly and weak and pathethic. I want to stop hurting. I miss the bastard. I don't know if I can do this. I don't know if I want to do this. I have two young kids to look after and it is so so so so so hard.

I think you need to talk to him. What were the circumstances of the emotional affair? There's no point separating if your not completely sure it's what you want. You will just feel regretful.

Give yourself time. There's no rush. Don't make a decision yet. Of course you miss him...bet you don't miss the feeling of anxiety every time his phone beeps though etc.
stay strong, stay focused and use some time to really process it and think about what's best FOR YOU, not him, not the kids but FOR YOU.

Hi, I do understand. It't a horrible time and you sound lost. I can relate to that too. I don't know if this will help but you asked someone to hold your hand and tell you to be strong. I hope this feels like you know that you're not alone. I know it really hurts because you miss him so much and your feelings are mixed, hurt, hatred and love, which leaves you confused. Whatever you decide to do, you sound like you need a friend to talk things through and listen. Individual counselling helped me, as well as a couple of really good friends I could totally trust and confide in. Your counsellor will help you to see things more clearly as well as help take you through your feelings. I can't recommend it enough. Do you have access to a counselling service?

Yes, the councelling is in the works. And his family have been absolutely angels and so supportive. I just don't want to feel this hurt anymore. I hate it. My head knows what is best really, but it's my heart that has control over me today. Thanks all for holding my hand.

And that's what makes you who you are, a woman with a loving heart. I think those of us who fall deeply hurt most when it goes wrong because you invest so much. I think it's a wonderful thing that someone as loving as you will see that and it will be what makes them love you. Take some time out right now to think about the little everyday things your children do hat make you smile. Their love will help to get you through this and when it gets tough give them huge hugs, you'll get them back 10 fold x